‘You move with confidence. You will be unfazed. That is valor’
Bangalore (India), June 6:
Q. Since coming into the Art of Living, I am aware of more ups and downs in my life. Am I experiencing the karma of past lifetimes on the fast track or is it like this?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: What happens when you meditate? The contrast between the ups and downs in life is greater. On a white cloth, even a small dust particle is clearly seen. Similarly, when the mind becomes more pure, even small jealousy or anger is an irritant. It is unbearable and you have to get rid of it quickly. This is but quite natural.
At the same time, you get the inner strength to endure situations.
Q. Since coming into the Art of Living, I am aware of more ups and downs in my life. Am I experiencing the karma of past lifetimes on the fast track or is it like this?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: What happens when you meditate? The contrast between the ups and downs in life is greater. On a white cloth, even a small dust particle is clearly seen. Similarly, when the mind becomes more pure, even small jealousy or anger is an irritant. It is unbearable and you have to get rid of it quickly. This is but quite natural.
At the same time, you get the inner strength to endure situations.
Q. After I started with my spiritual practices, I, no longer, have the killer instinct to compete. Am I a misfit in the corporate world?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Don’t be harsh on yourself. Running around between tasks, will not bring achievement. Just relax. For that you need inner strength.
Q. Will the Sudarshan kriya*, help to remove substance abuse?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Yes, definitely. It needs some support system, some perseverance. There should be friends, and family to remind the person to stick to the practices. That is why our de-addiction programs are residential. If people who need help stay for 10-15 days and follow the routine, then the recovery is faster.
Q. When will I get freedom?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: First understand what freedom is. Drop whatever burden you feel in the mind. Quieten the mind.
The mind will say: ‘I want this’, ‘I want that’ - drop everything.
Have the sankalpa: I am happy, contented and don’t need anything.
When you are free, bliss follows you.
If you are chasing 20 desires, there is no freedom.
Q. Do you love me?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Does anyone ask water – do you flow?
Do you ask the mountain – do you stand?
Do you ask the sun - do you shine?
Do you ask clouds – do you give rain?
Then how can you ask – do you love me?
Love IS and love is not an emotion. It is our very being.
Don’t ask anyone if they love you – only fools ask this.
Even if someone is angry, he is demonstrating love.
Emotions like anger, jealousy, and greed are because of love.
Love is our nature.
If someone is sleeping, do you ask the person are you sleeping?
If you do, then you have already woken them up!
Q. I have marital trouble. How do I solve it?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: From your end, don’t think that you are distant from him. Whatever he says, accept it.
Try to understand him.
Put your 100 percent – it will work.
What does a mother do, when a child cries? She pacifies him, the child quietens, and then will cry again after a while.
Like you pacify a child, pacify your husband. Sometimes there are misunderstandings.
In ancient days, Rishis (saints) would bless women by saying - become a mother to 10 children and may the eleventh child be your husband. This is to say – love your husband as a child.
A lady once came to me with her problems about her mother-in-law.
Have you ever thought about this? You have fought so much with your mother. Like you fight with your mother, you fight with your mum-in-law. Yet you get upset. Think of her like a mother.
Change your perspective. Knowledge will help you to live harmoniously.
Q. My husband is very arrogant. How do I reduce his arrogance?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Ok, make your husband’s arrogance very strong. Say, ‘There is nobody like you.’
Keep increasing his arrogance.
Wherever there is arrogance, it will be taught a lesson.
Q. Someone hurt my eye last year. Why hasn’t the person got punished?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Those who wrong, will receive a punishment for sure.
However, if you enjoy his punishment, that is wrong.
You should pray, that he does not hurt anyone else. Let his mind become fine.
Don’t think that he should be hurt in return.
Q. If we use valor to handle a situation, elders feel we have forgotten our manners. How to handle the situation?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Don’t justify your anger as valor. If you’re arrogant, and behave rudely, your behavior cannot be justified.
Valor is an inner phenomenon. It gives immense patience, perseverance and inner strength.
It does not mean screaming, and shouting. Screaming, and shouting means you are weak.
If you’re really strong, you will just smile.
You move with confidence. You will be unfazed. That is valor.
This is one side of the story. The other side is that whatever you do, someone will criticize you. You will be blamed if you act, and even if you don’t act. If you speak, or don’t speak.
You can’t keep pleasing everyone.
If your focus is on finding shortcomings, either in yourself or in others, you cannot raise higher.
Recognize that if someone gives a comment, reflect on it. If there is some truth, accept it.
If not, then thank them and move on.
Don’t ask them why. Just say: ‘I appreciate your perception’ and move on.
Q. You often say that seva brings merit which helps us to meditate better. Today, I did seva 100 percent so that I can meditate better. Is that ok?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: We should not judge ourselves too much. If you go on judging yourself all the time, it is not going to help you.
At the same time, you cannot be blind to your behaviors, and tendencies. It has to be a gentle middle path. Either extremes can be detrimental.
There is a Sanskrit phrase which says that when you place a lamp on a short wall between two rooms, light will fall in both rooms. In the same way, keep a bit light on what is happening inside, and outside of you.
Q. Why do liars, sinful people progress more than honest people?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: People who practice unethical ways, cannot come up in life. This is the truth. It will not be sustained.
You have patience. Don’t think that all honest people are suffering. Suffering is not because of honesty, but because of foolishness.
You have to have smartness, intelligence, dynamism, and creativity alongwith honesty.
Sudarshan kriya* - a stress-elimination breath technique that is taught in Art of Living programs
(From the Office of His Holiness S Sri Ravi Shankar)
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: People who practice unethical ways, cannot come up in life. This is the truth. It will not be sustained.
You have patience. Don’t think that all honest people are suffering. Suffering is not because of honesty, but because of foolishness.
You have to have smartness, intelligence, dynamism, and creativity alongwith honesty.
Sudarshan kriya* - a stress-elimination breath technique that is taught in Art of Living programs
(From the Office of His Holiness S Sri Ravi Shankar)
© The Art of Living Foundation