7 Steps to Cope with Frustration

In our day-to-day lives, there are so many situations where we can get frustrated, and when such things happen, there is nothing you can do. Something or the other keeps coming up and we keep getting frustrated.

You want perfection and perfection is not available, and so you get frustrated. You want someone to do things on time and if they don't do it, then you get frustrated. You want things to be done in the way you want, and if it does not happen, you get frustrated – isn't this the case?

In life, you will have 101 reasons to get frustrated. However, it is up to you keep the enthusiasm alive without allowing the frustration to seep in. Here are some pointers to help in dealing with frustration.

#1 If you find any imperfection in another, don’t get frustrated and criticize them, instead volunteer to help them grow

There are some very talented people in the world, but they too have some negative points. Now, if you look only at the minus points, their talents become invisible. When you are looking for perfection everywhere around, I tell you, you forget to see the imperfection inside of you. You want everything to be perfect, but are you perfect? You have to look for that.

When you gain perfection at something, you will stop pointing out imperfections and you will stop getting frustrated about the imperfections of others, and instead contribute to their growth – to help them become perfect.

Everyone has flaws, and everyone has some very good qualities as well. But if you see only flaws, then you will miss out on their plus points. Nobody can become perfect overnight. It is a gradual process, and we need to encourage them to help them get there.

#2 Don’t get too caught up in problems and get frustrated. Know that every problem is temporary.

In the world we inhabit, there is pleasure and there is pain. This is the nature of the world. Some or the other reason will always present itself for you to be upset. Sometimes it could be the behavior of a family member or the behavior of a friend. If the family is okay, then it could be the neighbors who are causing problems. And if the neighbors are also good, then it could be the dogs on the street who keep barking all night, not letting you sleep. And if that isn’t a problem either and there are no problems, then too you are not satisfied. Then you start interfering in the lives of people who have problems, and you try to solve their problems.

So, this life is very mysterious. That’s why it is said that this world is maya (an illusion) and we best not get caught up in it. Because this is what happens – you tend to get caught up in different situations that fill your mind with all kinds of negativities.

#3 Keep your attention focused inwards – on what you are contributing, doing, saying, thinking, feeling

Many times, we get caught up in conflicts with others around us – this person did this to me; that person did like this to me. And we lash out at others. If this happens, know that you have lost your center.

To deal with such frustration, the best way is to keep your attention on yourself. Ask yourself – what is my contribution to this world? What have I done for others? How useful have I been to the people around me?

If your thoughts are moving in this direction, then you will not blame or hurt others. Otherwise, you will always find faults in others and slash out at them.

#4 If you catch yourself complaining, become aware and let go of your complaints. Channelize your energy into doing something productive

People who complain are not productive, and people who work hard have nothing to complain about because they are busy working.

Those who are not productive keep finding faults in other people. They find faults in the smallest of things. They are not able to see the good in other people and this leads to so much frustration. We must ensure that we do not let frustration seep into us. Keep busy, be productive!

#5 Blame and praise is part of life – don’t let them put you in a reactive mode

If you live in a society of humans, then it is only natural that sometimes you will be praised and sometimes blamed. Suppose you are working at a company; you cannot expect your boss to behave in a way that is convenient to you all the time. You want perfection in your boss?!

Suppose you have a boss who has a habit of taunting and has taunted you three to four times. You go ahead and label her/him as “hopeless” and you start behaving in the same manner with her/him. Your perception puts you in a reactive mode. You need to correct your perception, and understand that there is imperfection in the world.

#6 Accept people and situations as they are, and be centered

When you accept that things are how they are and people are the way they are, suddenly you find the witness consciousness inside of you dawning and that makes you feel so centered and deep. This doesn't mean that you should not point out anyone’s mistakes and just accept everything as they are. No!

I was driving past Kannakapura Road and I saw garbage on the side of the road and I told my secretary to immediately call the Panchayat. They have been given two vans to pick up the garbage and get it done immediately. We have to keep acting in this way, but without getting into frustration.

It is very easy to wash your hands off and sit in the corner and feel, “I don't have anything to do with all of this” and let things run the way they are running. And it is very easy to get frustrated and keep complaining. But the perfect balance lies in taking action by smartly dealing with frustration.

#7 Consciously choose not to get frustrated, and maintain your inner peace

We keep getting frustrated with others – this is a common occurance. But sometimes we also get frustrated with our own self; we become dissatisfied with our own self, because of small insignificant things. Maintaining equanimity is part of Yoga – come what may, not letting frustration creep into oneself. Then the intellect functions better, the brain functions better, and you get ideas on how to handle different situations.

So, don't get frustrated with people and situations, and don't get frustrated about yourself because you are repeating the same mistakes again and again. Neither will help. This is a very delicate balance – to keep the enthusiasm alive within oneself without allowing frustration to enter. And acting only when and where it is needed.

Do your problems really exist? - Part I

This world is in our own mind! We look only at the world that exists in our mind, which we imagine in our own way, though the world outside may be different. Most of the problems in your mind start from your imagination.

If you are unhappy or have had an unpleasant life, it is due to the world in your mind. You have created such a universe. “Vishva” is a wonderful word – “shva” means either yesterday or tomorrow, and “vishva” means the special yesterday or tomorrow that we create in our own mind. In our mind, we imagine certain things as huge, though we are uncertain how they actually are. We are stuck in worries about yesterday and imaginings about tomorrow, which is why we lack enthusiasm. Enthusiasm is a quality of life, yet some people find only boredom and unhappiness.

Observe, in what direction is your life moving – day by day, are you gaining enthusiasm or losing it? Look at a child five or six years old or a toddler of three to six months. They are filled with enthusiasm. It overflows from every cell of their body. Compare children with grown-ups and see if enthusiasm increases or decreases with age. Are we really living when we lose enthusiasm? This has happened because of our “Vishva” – we have made such a world. Now to drop this, should you run away from society to some cave in the Himalayas? You will not find happiness just by entering a cave.

The world originates in your mind. Only you have created it. Only you can drop it.

The solution is in your own body. “Shakti chakra sandhane vishvasamharah(Shiv Sutras)” -When you direct your attention to the energy centres of the body, the world of worries and thoughts that trouble your mind will disappear. There will be peace.

God exists; He loves you a lot and He is in you.

Bhodhgaya, 20 January 2012


Life is priceless. It is a gift from God. If we don’t care for it, we remain unhappy. When we care for it, we start receiving what we desire. I have come here to remind you one thing, do you know what? No, that is why I have come here to remind you of it (laughs). You don’t know why I have come here, right? I have come to remind you that there is one power that exists; God exists. If you don’t believe me then ask me. I’ll say, God exists. And He loves you a lot. Then you’ll ask, ‘Why did He give me suffering? If God exists, then why is there misery’? When we go against him or become ungrateful, then sorrow increases. When we are troubled, then we will have to seek God. Then we come to know that in times of pain, there has been someone by my side.


It is said that God measures and then attaches the tail on each animal. He did not attach the tail of an elephant to a goat, because it will not be able to carry it. Every animal is assigned a tail as long as it can carry. Similarly, every person’s problem is his tail. You face only those problems that you can handle. I have come to solve those problems that you cannot handle. All the Gurus and intellectuals in the society are there primarily to solve your problems. The whole world, and your friends and relatives are there with you. You are not alone. So, ‘God is there, He exists’; I have come here just to remind you of this fact. God is there and He loves you a lot and He is in you.


If for small and frequent intervals we quieten our minds, we will be able to establish that connection with him. Then, whatever you desire, will no longer remain impossible. ‘Jo ichcha kariho manu maahi, prabhu prataap kachhu durlabh naahin’ (A saying in a language spoken in north-central and eastern India that describes the previous sentence). This is a proven fact. All of us have gathered for a satsang here. The benefit should be that this smile that you are now wearing should never wither from your face. You have got your troubles here, leave it here, and go back with a smile, and be assured that your work will be done. It might take some time for it to be completed, but it will happen for sure. It may take some time, but it is not necessary that it will take time.


It has been thirty years since I have moved around the world. Today, you’ll find that in every corner of this world, the Indian culture and spirituality is being respected. If you go to the last city of the North Pole, Tromso, or to the last city of the South Pole, Tierra del Fuego, you will find people doing kirtan, pranayama and meditation. If you go there and say, Jai Guru Dev, you’ll find thousands of people. India is a wonderful place. The feet of God is attached to this place (referring to Bodh Gaya, Bihar, India where the satsang was organized). ‘Vishnu Paad’ (The feet of Vishnu) is attached here. This is the significance of Gaya. Buddha received knowledge at this place. Siddhartha became Buddha here and spread his knowledge all over the world. You are living on such a pure soil.


Read more at What Sri Sri Said Today

© The Art of Living Foundation

‘There is a non-changing, eternal element in you’

Bangalore ashram, Jan. 24:

As it was Sunday and Sri Sri Ravi Shankar usually talks in Kannada, there were many people in the ashram who didn’t understand Kannada. So Sri Sri Ravi Shankar said, ‘If you don’t understand kannada it doesn’t matter. Just be a part of everything. Laugh when everybody laughs and clap when everybody claps’.

Q: I am little nervous in front of you and my heart beat is also rising. While doing the course I heard that our existence is eternal. I want to know what is connection of this incarnation with the eternal presence?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: To know that everything is changing you need to have a reference point. That reference point is the unchanging in you. There is a non-changing, eternal element in you because of which you can experience change.

Q: I am coming from Tamil Nadu. I took the course. After the course, I underwent lots of struggles. The more I do my sadhana, lots of challenges, problems are coming. What to do?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: There is a saying in Tamil which means that ‘God created the tail of the goat according to its capacity’. Be bold and face the problems. Don’t worry, only that kind of problem will come in life which you can handle, which is within your capacity to handle. So handle it, go through it all boldly.

Q: I do seva for the society by organizing courses and I sometimes fail to do my home duties. In that case, my parents scold me saying, I am not taking care of home. Should I take care of the society or home? What to do?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Your know, how to ride bicycle? How do you balance? Like that, you have to do both and balance the duties.

Q: I want to know the relationship between the conscious mind, sub-conscious mind and the infinite intelligence of the sub-conscious mind?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Yes! The sub-conscious mind has infinite intelligence. Whatever you put in the sub-conscious mind, it will manifest. If you put the thought that you are poor, that will start happening and if you put positive thoughts that everybody is good then that will start happening.

Q: In 2003, you came and started good work from the temple. All good work is happening till now. We request you to come again and bless the people.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Yes, in Tamil Nadu, you have to do lots of work. There is a lot of problem regarding caste. You all have to do something, work for it.

Q: I am coming from Polachi. I was having a spinal cord problem before taking this course. I took the course and now I can sit and do all my work without anybody's help.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: See, what doctors can’t do, pranayama does. It can do wonders Q: After solving one problem, one more comes up. What should I do?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Have the faith that you will be helped and your problem will get solved.

Q: Guruji, I am physically handicapped. I was thinking, how can I contribute to society? Now I am working with the Divine Karnataka Project, presently, in the Sheshadripuram slum (in Bangalore). I am feeling very confident.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: We have to work a lot in slums. We have to make them literate and we have to eradicate castism from slums. For that we all have to work together. In Bangalore alone there are 400 slums and Art of Living is working in 105 of those slums. People in slums are addicted to alcohol and we have to stop this. Those very places and countries have lost their culture where people were too much into alcohol. People in these areas earn good money but they spent more than half of that on alcohol. How can we stop them? By giving them an alternative source of intoxication, by bringing them to satsang and making them experience intoxication and the joy of meditation. Do you feel intoxication in meditation and satsang? (‘Yes’ from the audience) So, you feel change after doing all this. All DKP yuvacharyas (youth leaders) have to go to slums and work in these places. You may face some obstacles but walk ahead and keep working. A member of the audience shares an experience: “I did the basic course three months ago in Andhra Pradesh. The happiness I have experienced in the last three months, I didn’t experience in the last 26 years of my life. I am very thankful to you.”

“That which you cannot express is Love.
That which you cannot reject/renounce is Beauty.
That which you cannot avoid is the Truth.”
~ Sri Sri Ravishankar



© The Art of Living Foundation
For Global Spirituality

What Sri Sri said today

‘Highest expression of puja is meditation’

Bangalore, India, June 14:
Q. I’ve heard your talk on the Ashtavakra Gita (the conversation between Sage Ashtavakra and King Janaka on the knowledge of the Supreme Self). When King Janaka explains Aho! In wonderment, what was the reason? How can I achieve the same state of wonderment?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: When Ashtavakra imparted the knowledge to King Janaka, wonder arose in him. Aho! He wondered, ‘How did I not recognize this truth for so long!’

Once he realized this truth, he said, ‘Salutations to myself!’ Namo mahyam! The transforming experience that ‘I am the paramatma, the Divine consciousness' came to him.
The knowledge dawned that there is no difference between myself and the Divine consciousness which is omnipotent, omnipresent and omniscient.
Leaving behind the limited mind and being established in the infinite consciousness is the Ashtavakra Gita.
We search for the Divine everywhere except within us. The process of puja or worship is to lead us from the external world to within. The highest expression of puja is meditation. In puja, we use and honor the five elements which form the basis of this creation and we honor ourselves as well.
When we do achamanam or offering of oblations, we offer water to kesava, the Divine within us. Each process in the puja leads us within.
When you go to sleep at night, think that the Divine is within me, ‘Salutations to the Divine in my heart!’ Meditate upon this, and then go to sleep. Then see how the quality of your sleep is!

There is no difference between the Guru, the Self and the Divine. Antarmukhi sada sukhi - He who perceives the Divinity within, whose mind is turned inward, is always happy.

The Divine consciousness is not limited like the body but is present everywhere like the space.
Honoring this divine consciousness is the Ashtavakra Gita.

Q. Between karma and bhagya (good fortune or luck), which is more important?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: When you are in front of the television, do you listen to the voice first or watch the screen? They happen simultaneously, isn’t it? In the same way, both karma (action) and bhagya(good fortune) are important. When we perform appropriate actions, then we become bhagya or fortunate. When we have good fortune, then our actions are fruitful.

Q. Everyone comes to you with their problems. Do you have any problems of your own?
H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: I have no troubles. That is why I can take away yours. If the doctor is sick, then can he heal you? Since I have no problems, you have come to me.


(Sri Sri points to a large crowd of jawans (soldiers) who came for satsang and applauds their commitment to the nation. He tells the audience:)

When we eat our food everyday, we must remember with gratitude the farmer who has worked for it. Anna Dhata Sukhi Bhava is a traditional blessing that wishes happiness to the giver of food. We should bless the soldiers who guard our borders at the cost of their own lives. They are the wealth of our nation. They should be happy and their families should be happy. Our blessings will surely reach them.

(From the Office of His Holiness Sri Sri Ravi Shankar)

© The Art of Living Foundation