Balancing the different colours of life

 

Life is utterly simple and yet most complex. You have to simultaneously attend to both facets of life. When life appears most complex, turn to simplicity. Simplicity brings peace. When you are peaceful attend to the complexity. That will make you more skillful. If you are only with simplicity, it makes you lazy and dull, growth is not there.

Being only with complexity makes you angry and frustrated, then there is no life at all. The intelligent ones skillfully balance these two and rejoice in both. When you recognize both the simplicity and the complexity of life, you will be skillfully peaceful. Colours are the complexity of life. White is the simplicity. When your heart is pure, your life becomes so colorful.

Hygiene supports health but too much hygiene destroys health. In too hygienic a situation, the immune system in the body becomes like lazy, unequipped soldiers. People who live in slums often don’t get sick because their immune system becomes like a well-trained soldier. Often people who are too fussy about hygiene have poor health. Sometimes unhygienic conditions create health. It keeps your immune system active, alive and strong, while knowledge keeps your mind fresh. 

Your life is a gift and you have come to unwrap the gift. In the process of unwrapping, remember to also save the wrapper. Your whole environment, situations, circumstances, body are the wrapping paper. 

When we unwrap, we often tear the wrapping paper. We are in such a hurry that at times we even destroy the gifts. With patience and endurance, open your gifts and save the wrappers. We play many roles in our lives. If all the roles get mixed up, it becomes dark, like when you mix all the colours. The wise play each role distinctively side by side, like the colours displayed side by side form a rainbow. 

Strength of sacrifice

 

Sacrifice is letting go of something that you are holding on to or that you are attached to giving up something that gives you pleasure for something bigger that would bring good. Sacrifice brings strength in life. Life without sacrifice is stagnant. Sacrifice gives you a quantum leap, to a higher pedestal. 

Often people think sacrifice makes life dull and joyless. In fact, it is sacrifice that makes life worth living. The amount of sacrifice in your life brings out your magnanimity and helps you move out of misery. A life without sacrifice is worth nothing. Zeal, enthusiasm, strength and joy all come from sacrifice. 

Some people complain, “I have sacrificed so much”. That is good. The thought of sacrifice has given them the strength to complain. This saves them from blaming themselves, otherwise they would be more depressed. Sacrifice never goes unrewarded. There can be no love, no wisdom and no true joy without sacrifice. Sacrifice makes you sacred. Become sacred. 

True surrender comes with bhakti

 

Self-reliance requires enormous courage. When there is nobody else or you want to depend on yourself for everything, you need a lot of courage. Surrender takes less courage. A person who cannot surrender cannot be self-reliant either. If you don’t have enough courage to surrender, then it is not possible to be self-reliant, you simply fool yourself. If you do not have a hundred dollars, you cannot have a thousand dollars. Even a little fear is detrimental to self-reliance. Self-reliance contains surrender. Fifty dollars contains ten dollars.

Often people think that surrender is a way to escape from their responsibilities, then they end up blaming the Divine for all their problems. In fact, true surrender is taking total responsibility for everything. How? Take full responsibility and then pray for help. Surrender eventually leads you to self-reliance because there is nothing other than the big self.

In the word bhakti there are four letters “bha” “ka” “ta” and “I” (ee). “Bha” means fulfilment and nourishment. “Ka” is a means of knowing. “Ta” means redeeming, saving, salvation (tarana). “I” (ee) is shakti, or energy. So there are four components to bhakti: fulfillment and nourishment, a means of knowing, salvation, and energy. Bhakti nourishes you. Bhakti is the right knowledge, the means of knowing. When bhakti is there, doubts do not come.

Bhakti saves you. Bhakti gives you the most energy. Bhakti contains the seed of all these qualities. All the emotional upheavals one goes through are because one doesn’t know bhakti. A river has two banks that allow water to flow in a particular direction. In a flood, water is scattered all over. When your emotions get flooded everywhere, your mind is in a mess. When all your intense feelings flow in one direction, that is most powerful, that is bhakti. A sign of intelligence is bhakti and surrender.

There is no escape from seva

 

All the talents you have are for others. If you have a good voice, it is for others. If you are a good cook, it is for others. If you write a good book, it is for others, you don’t sit and read your own book. If you are a good carpenter, it is for others. If you are a good surgeon, it is for others, you cannot do your own surgery. If you are a schoolteacher, it is for others. All your work and talents are useful for others. Make use of your talents, or they will not be given to you again.

When you do seva, do not think you are doing a favour for somebody. Your seva has rewarded you immediately. Your reward is for sure and is always more than your doing. Your expectation of reward turns seva into labour. If you think you have done a lot, you will do very little. Just see that you have done little, then you will do more. Seva means that even when you don’t see an immediate reward, there is no complaint, labour means that even after an immediate reward, there are complaints. Be grateful for any opportunity to do seva.

The first sign of intelligence is not to begin anything, not to be born at all. Failing this, the second sign of intelligence is, once you have started something, to see it through to the end. Short-sighted people look for short term benefits. Far sighted people look for long-term benefits. Whether you consider yourself intelligent or not, there is no escape from seva. Seva gives you immediate satisfaction as well as long-term merits. The more you give, the more strength will be given. The way to expand from individual to universal consciousness is to share the sorrow and joy of others. As you grow, your consciousness should also grow. As you expand in knowledge over time, depression is not possible. Your innermost source is Joy.

The way to overcome personal misery is to share universal misery. The way to expand personal joy is to share universal joy. Instead of thinking, “What about me?” “What can I gain from this world?” Think, “What can I do for the knowledge?” When everyone comes from the point of contributing to society, you will have a divine society. We have to educate ourselves and culture our individual consciousness to expand with time in the knowledge from “What about me?” to “What can I contribute?”

If you are not having good experiences in meditation, then do more seva – you will gain merit and your meditation will go deeper. When you bring some relief or freedom to someone through seva, good vibrations and blessings come to you. Seva brings merit; merit allows you to go deep in meditation and meditation brings back your smile. 

Don't quit seva

 

Many people quit doing seva when they put their self -image, prestige, respect, comfort and convenience ahead of their goal. What is more important to you? People shy away from seva when they do not receive a good position or when they get insulted. People stop doing seva when they feel they are not getting what they expected out of it.

They stop their seva when they consider working towards their goal a struggle, rather than a challenge. And that is why only a few people in the world succeed in reaching their goal. Service without attitude, love without reason, knowledge without intellect, life beyond time and events, IS what you are. You cannot rest when you have to do something that you cannot do. And you cannot rest when you feel you have to be someone who you are not.

You are not required to do what you cannot do. You will not be asked to give more than what you can give. Nothing is expected of you that you cannot do. Doing service involves only doing what you can do, no one wants you to be someone you are not. This realisation brings you deep rest. You cannot rest if you have either ambition or lethargy. Both are opposed to good rest.

A lazy person will toss and turn at night and be “restless” while an ambitious person will burn inside. This rest brings up your talents and abilities and brings you closer to your nature. Even a slight feeling that the Divine is with you will brings deep rest. Prayer, love and meditation are all flavours of deep rest.

Seva and success

 

Our first and foremost commitment in the world is to do seva, or service. If there is fear in your life, it is because of a lack of commitment. The very thought, “I’m here in this world to do seva”, dissolves the “I” and when the “I” dissolves, worries dissolve. Seva is not something you do out of convenience or for pleasure. The ultimate purpose of life is to be of service. 

An uncommitted mind is miserable. A committed mind may at times experience rough weather but it will reap the fruits of its toil. When you make service your sole purpose in life, it eliminates fear, brings focus in your mind and purposefulness, action and long-term joy-and may be short- term problems.

Poor people fight for food. Rich people share their food. Richer are those who share power. Richer still are those who share fame. Richest of all are those who share themselves. The richness of a person is indicated by his ability to share and not by what he hoards. What does success mean? 

There is no question of success if you have nothing to gain. There is nothing to gain if you have come only to give and serve. Success indicates non - supremacy. It indicates that there is a chance of failure. If something is supreme, there is nothing to lose. People running after success only exhibit their limitations.

Success means crossing a limit. To cross a limit, you need to assume that you have a limit. Assuming a limit is underestimating yourself. If you have no boundaries, then where is the question of success? If you have limitless access, then there is no success. You do not say that you successfully drank a glass of water, because it is well within your capabilities. But when you do something that is beyond your perceived limits, you claim success.

When you realize your unboundedness, then no action is an achievement. Anyone who claims to be successful only reveals his limitation. If you feel very successful, it means that you have underestimated yourself. All your gains can only be smaller than you. Taking pride in any gains is belittling yourself.

When you serve others, you may feel that you have not done enough but you will never feel that you have been unsuccessful. Real service is when you feel that you have not done enough.

Need to feel generous

 

Though many ask for blessings, but only a few will receive. The giver is always giving but the taker is not there - the sincerity is missing. One who gives blessings gives freely, but the one who receives has to be sincere. The qualification to receive blessings is sincerity. And everyone is free to be sincere at any time.

Why do people choose to be sincere only sometimes? Because of the illusion that they are going to miss some mundane pleasure. Hankering after pleasure makes them insincere. When you are sincere, you simply enjoy pleasure without craving for it. Sincerity is being in touch with your depth. 

When you feel you are stuck in life and not growing, or are bombarded by desires, when you feel dryness, no enthusiasm, no juice, what do you do? Here is the solution. Feel generous - right now, not tomorrow, but right now. Both a princess and a pauper can feel generous. Generosity is a quality of the spirit. When you feel generous, your life becomes abundant full of compassion and love.

Is generosity the same as gratitude? No. Gratitude always has self-concern. You are grateful because you have something or you get something. Generosity is independent of external circumstances. No one can make you feel generous. That is something that you have to do by yourself. Essentially generosity is not an act. It is a state of consciousness, but it always finds its expression in an act.

Passion, on the other hand, indicates scarcity. Dispassion is abundance. Dispassion without generosity makes you self centred and causes more dryness. Don't think about what you've done in the past, that only brings doership. Just feel generous. 

Joyous imperfection

 

When we are joyful, we do not look for perfection. If you are looking for perfection then you are not at the source of joy. Joy is the realisation that there is no vacation from wisdom. The world appears imperfect on the surface but underneath, all is perfect. Perfection hides, imperfection shows off.

The wise will not dwell on the surface but will probe into the depths. The things you see are not blurred, it is your vision that is blurred. Infinite actions exist in the wholeness of consciousness, and yet consciousness remains perfect, untouched. Realize this now and be at home.

Legendary is the love that withstands rejection. It will be free of anger and ego. 

Legendary is the commitment that withstands humiliation. It will be one-pointed and will reach the goal. 

Legendary is the wisdom that withstands turbulence. It will be integrated into life. 

Legendary is the faith that withstands a million chances of doubt. It will bring perfection -siddhis. 

Legendary are the events that withstand time. They will become morals for millions. 

Only truth can set you free

 

Truth is that which does not change. Examine your life and identify all that changes as “not truth”. With this outlook, you will find that you are surrounded by only untruth. When you identify untruth, then you will become free from it. 

When you do not identify the untruth, you cannot become free from it. Your own experiences in life make you identify your own untruth. As you mature in life, you find everything is untruth, events, situations, people, emotions, thoughts, opinions, concepts, your body, everything is untruth.

It is only then that satsang, the company of truth, happens in the real sense. A mother cannot see the child as untruth until the child becomes an adult. For a baby, sweet is not untruth, and for a teenager, sex is not untruth.

Knowledge is also untruth if it is only words. But as existence, it is truth. Love as an emotion is not truth, as existence, it is truth. 

Faith cannot be analysed

 

Do you know the difference between faith and confidence? Faith is the beginning. Confidence is the result. Faith in yourself brings freedom. Faith in the world brings you peace of mind. Faith in God evokes love in you.

If you have complete faith, there are no questions. If you have no faith there is no point in asking any questions because how can there be any faith in the answer you receive? If you have faith in God when you know someone is taking care of you, what is the need for questions?

If you have taken the Karnataka Express to Bangalore, there is no need to ask at every station, “Where is the train going?” When someone is taking care of your desires, why go to an astrologer?

What about blind faith? Faith is faith, it cannot be blind. What you call blind is not faith at least not yours. Blindness and faith cannot meet. It is when you lose faith that you become blind. 

Whatever you have faith in, do not make it an object of knowing. You do not need to know about that in which you have faith. If you have faith in God, do not try to know God. God and self are not objects of knowing. You cannot have faith in that which you have made into an object of knowing. A child has faith in the mother. The child does not try to know the mother, it simply has faith in the mother. You cannot make love an object of knowing. If you try to do so, the love will disappear.

Curiosity to know obstructs faith by making into an object of knowing that in which you have faith. Often when people fall in love with each other, they don’t let go of curiosity. Curiosity slowly erodes their faith and love. 

Faith is non-analytical. Knowledge is analytical. God, love, Guru, sleep and Self are beyond knowing. If you try to analyse, you get confused. And the moment you make something into an object of knowing, analysis starts.

Does God have faith in us? To know whether God has faith or not, you have to analyse. And in asking this question, you give God a mind which is not there. 

One can have faith without being aware of it. Faith is the nature of a relaxed and undivided consciousness. 

Faith and devotion

 

False securities do not allow your faith to grow. Faith grows only when you have dropped your securities. 

False security is keeping faith where it does not belong. It is the illusion of security in having a job, a house, friends. Even if you have all the material securities, without faith, you will still reel in fear. When you buffer your life with securities, you keep faith away. Faith is your greatest security and brings perfection in you. 

Keep the money in the bank or in the pocket, not in the mind. Keep friends and family where they belong, not in the mind. You must let go of all possessions in the mind. Keep the house where it belongs, not in the mind. 

The Divine is your only security. Your body belongs to the world. Your spirit belongs to the Divine. Faith is realizing that you always get what you need. Faith is giving the Divine a chance to act.

Have faith in sound and then move on to have faith in silence. Have faith in sound when it is pleasant and have faith in silence when sound is unpleasant. 

People seem to have more faith in chatting and gossip rather than in chanting and knowledge. When someone says something bad, you immediately believe it and your mind becomes more disturbed. Believing in an unpleasant sound creates turmoil in your mind. In that situation, shift your faith to silence. Have faith in sound like the chanting of mantras. Have faith in knowledge. Have faith in silence.

Faith is the subject of the head, devotion is the subject of the heart and meditation connects them both. 

A mature intellect is devoted, a mature heart is full of knowledge and meditation matures your intellect as well as your heart. 

Head puts more faith in matter and the heart puts more faith in the abstract. It is nearly impossible that an intellectual person has total lack of faith or total lack of devotion. In science knowledge comes first and then faith follows. In spirituality faith comes first and then knowledge follows. 

The knowledge that pesticides and chemical fertilizers are good for plants came through science. Based on this knowledge, people had faith in pesticides and fertilizers; they were used all over the world. Then a different knowledge came that these were not good and faith shifted to organic farming. The same with antibiotics.

Benefits of dispassion

 

If your work is very stressful and you don't get enough time for the family, what should you do? Do you spend quality time with your family? Even if you spend half an hour, are you cordial and fully attentive to the needs of your family? It is not the length of time you spend with your family that matters. What matters is the quality of time that you spend with them.

Thinking you need rest makes you restless. 

Thinking you have to work hard makes you tired. 

Thinking you have worked hard brings self-pity.

Hide your dispassion and express your love. Expressing dispassion may bring ego. By expressing dispassion you lose enthusiasm in life and by not expressing love you feel stifled. Hide dispassion in your heart like the roots of a tree and express love like a ripe fruit. 

When you are in the grip of feverishness over the results of your actions, what should you do? Have faith and confidence that the results will be much better than you can ever imagine. With faith you can rid yourself of the feverishness of action and achievement. Feverishness can be a hangover from overactivity. Sleeping, listening to flute music and bathing in cold water can help. 

When you are doing something very important, take a moment to do something totally irrelevant and insignificant. For example, while decorating your house, take some time to mow the lawn or go shopping. Drop whatever you are doing and do something completely irrelevant. This enhances your creativity. 

Relevant action keeps you bound to the action. Irrelevant action makes life a game. Have dispassion. Know that the whole thing will be over one way or the other, and that it does not matter. Meditation and breathing can calm you down.

Dispassion can get you everything, including sleep

 

The Divine can be attained only in deep rest, not by doing. All your spiritual activities are to help you become silent. You will go further when you do not stop to enjoy the bliss or the peace, otherwise cravings may arise.

If existence wants to give you peace and bliss, then fine, your true nature is bliss. But by trying to enjoy the bliss, you step down from “am-ness” to “I am something” - “I am peaceful”, “I am blissful” this is followed by, “I am miserable”. It takes courage to simply say “I am”, period. That “I am” is dispassion. Dispassion means welcoming everything. You can be anywhere and be dispassionate. Dispassionate centeredness brings energy, a spark.

Indulgence in bliss brings inertia. If you are dispassionate, the bliss is still there. When the freezer is full of ice cream, you need not bother about it. Dispassion takes away the sense of scarcity. Passion is a sense of lack of abundance. Whenever everything is in abundance, dispassion happens. And when dispassion is there, everything comes in abundance.

What should you do when you catch yourself indulging in bliss? Just this understanding creates a shift. There is no effort. Knowledge is better than action to make you free. 

Activity and rest are two vital aspects of life. To find a balance in them is a skill in itself. Wisdom is knowing when to have rest, when to have activity, and how much of each to have. Finding them in each other, activity in rest and rest in activity, is the ultimate freedom.

More tiring than the work itself is the memory of hard work. Thinking you have worked hard interferes with the quality of rest. Some people take pride in working hard without any results. And there are others who crave for a long rest without knowing the true rest is in non-doership. 

It is the quality of rest, even if it is short, that helps you to recuperate. When rest is needed, your body will automatically take it. Resting, without thinking about the need for it, is more restful. Desirelessness, dispassion and samadhi are the deepest rest.

Don't mind the time

 

When you are ahead of time, it drags and is boring. When time is ahead of you, then you are surprised and shocked. You cannot digest events. In deep meditation, you are time and everything is happening in you. Events are happening in you like the clouds that come and go in the sky. When you are with time, you are wise and at peace.

When you are happy, the mind expands, then time appears too short. When you are unhappy, the mind contracts, then time appears too long. When the mind has equanimity, you transcend time. To escape from time, many resort to alcohol or sleep but when the mind is dull or unconscious, it is unable to experience itself. 

Samadhi, no mindedness or timelessness, is the real peace. That is the greatest healer. A thought is nothing but a ripple in this moment of time. This moment also has a mind of its own, a big mind which has infinite organizing power. Before you fall into slumber or as soon as you wake up from sleep, in the moments of twilight of consciousness, experience the timelessness beyond mind. 

Life is a combination of form and formless. Feelings have no form but their expressions have form. The self has no form but its abode has form. Similarly, wisdom and grace have no form but are expressed through form. Discarding the formless, you become inert, materialistic and paranoid. Discarding the form, you become a dreamer, a lost ascetic, or an emotional wreck. 

Your entire experience is an illusion

 

When something is unbelievably beautiful or joyful, you wonder if it is a dream. Often what you perceive as reality is not joyful. When misery is there, you never wonder if it is a dream. You are sure it is real. This is knowing the real as unreal and unreal as real. In fact, all the miseries are unreal. A wise man knows that happiness is real, a quality of your very nature. Unhappiness is unreal, as it is only an affliction of memory. When you can see both as a dream, then you abide in your true self.

A nightmare is mistaken as a reality only while you are dreaming. Keep wondering whether your waking reality is a dream and you’ll wake up to the real.

Illusion is an error of perception and knowing illusion as illusion is knowledge. Our experience of the world is based on perception that is erroneous, so our experience of the world is an illusion. And each experience leaves a hangover that clouds the intellect. The experiencer is the only reality. Look for the seer, the experiencer, in between experiences. Wake up this moment. Shake your head of all past experiences and look at the pure being that I am and that you are.

What is maya?

 

There are 5 aspects to your self:

asti - is-ness

bhaati - knowledge or expression

preeti - love

nama - name

rupa - form

Matter has 2 aspects: name and form. Consciousness has 3 aspects: asti - it is, bhaati - it knows and expresses and preeti - it is loving. This is the secret of the whole universe. Maya - ignorance or delusion - is not being aware of the three aspects of consciousness and getting caught up in names and forms of matter.

Why are we imperfect? So that we can grow to perfection. Life is a movement from imperfection to perfection. A seed contains the tree but to become a tree it must cease being a seed. The seed is not a tree. A sapling is not a tree.

So in life you can either see imperfection at every step, or you can see movement from one perfection to another perfection. Wherever you put your attention, that will grow. If you put your attention on the lack of something, the lack will increase.

How can you always be happy? Forget about "always" - then you will be happy. In always wanting to be comfortable, you become lazy. In always wanting perfection, you become angry. In always wanting to be rich, you become greedy. Fear arises when we do not realise that only life is for always. This projection of the nature of Self - which is "always" - onto the temporal - which can never be "always" - is called maya. All ways do not lead you, only one way leads you. 

If you remove "always" from your dictionary, then everything is "all right". Drop "always" and all will be right - that is intelligence.

Divine love and infinity

 

When you love something, it becomes alive. With love, the whole creation becomes personal. For children, everything is personal. Children make each toy come alive. Even a tree has a face, even the sun laughs, and even a stone attracts reverence when it becomes personal. In love, you raise even objects to life. If you remove love, even people become objects. 

Violence is removing love. How could a person kill another? Only when they see them as an object, not as a person. People who see God as impersonal do not progress. The impersonal cannot attract your love or reverence. When we personalize something, we make it real. So then, what is reality? You are the reality. You are not the thoughts, you are not the emotions, nor the actions. You are not even a person. 

There are 3 kinds of love - the love that comes out of charm, the love that comes out of familiarity, and Divine love. The love that comes out of charm does not last long. Out of unfamiliarity you are attracted, then once you become familiar, you quickly lose attraction and boredom sets in, like most love marriages. This love may diminish and bring along with it fear, uncertainty, insecurity and sadness. The love that comes out of familiarity grows. You are more comfortable with an old friend who is a familiar person, rather than with a new person. But this love has no thrill, no enthusiasm, no fire in it. 

Divine love supersedes all other love. Divine love is ever new. The closer you come, the more charm and depth is there. Divine love has comfort, familiarity and enthusiasm. There is never boredom and it keeps you on your toes. Worldly love can be like an ocean, yet an ocean has a bottom. Divine love is like the sky, limitless, infinite. From the bottom of the ocean, soar into the vast sky.

Beyond an event is knowledge. Beyond an object is infinity. Beyond a person is love. Knowledge is beyond events. Every event colours your awareness in some way, pleasure, pain, joy, sorrow, anger, jealousy. Each event gives you a false notion of what reality is. Truth is beyond all the colours of particular events. Behind every object is infinity. Objects are limited and changing, yet they exist in infinite space that never changes. Reduce any object to atoms, you will find that within each atom is contained infinite space. Beyond all objects is infinity.

Beyond each person is love. A personality changes. A body, a mind, a complex of behaviours is always changing. Beyond each personality there is unchanging love, love is what you are. When you lose your self, you’ll find your self. The event behind the event is knowledge. The object behind the object is infinity. The person behind the person is love. Maya (delusion) is when you are stuck in events, personalities, or objects. Brahman, divine consciousness, is seeing beyond all these. See? Just a little shift.

Renounce your way to true love

 

Only who has renounced can love. To the degree you have renounced, to that degree will you have the ability to love. Often people think those who renounce cannot love, and those who love cannot renounce. This is because renunciates do not seem to be in love, and so-called lovers are possessive and needy. 

True love is not possessive, it brings freedom, and renunciation is nothing but freedom. Only in freedom can love blossom fully. When you are in love you say, “I want nothing, I just want this”. Renunciation is, “I do not want anything. I am free”. In love there is no other need. Renunciation is having no need. Love and renunciation, although appearing to be opposites, are two sides of the same coin.

Does this mean the lover renounces his beloved? No, you renounce the attachment, the possessiveness. Renunciation doesn’t diminish love, it enhances it. Only renunciation can sustain love and joy. Without renunciation love turns into misery, possessiveness, jealousy and anger. Renunciation brings contentment and contentment sustains love.

Without renunciation one gets discontented, frustrated, sad, fearful, suspicious, analytical. And the whole soap opera begins. And this is what we find in society don’t we? So-called renunciates have run away from life frustrated and disappointed. Real renunciation is born out of knowledge and wisdom, knowledge of life in the background of time and space and in the context of this magnanimous universe. You have to rejoice in the means. You have to love the means. Love is the goal but the means must also be lovable. Love springs forth when there is no effort, when all activities are shunned.

Love is your nature. When love finds an expression, you often become ensnared get caught up in the object. Your sight is caught outside. To return to your nature, you need insight. 

Pain is the first insight. It takes you away from the object and turns you towards your body and mind. Energy is the second insight. A bolt of energy brings you back to your self. Divine love is the third insight. A glimpse of Divine love makes you complete and overrules all relative pleasures. Ecstasy is the fourth insight. An elevation of consciousness and partial awareness of the physical reality around you is ecstasy. Non-dual awareness, that everything is made up of one and only one, is the fifth insight.

Don't give love, a (bad) name

 

An example inspires and brings confidence in the application of knowledge, and the visible sign of it is an undying smile. The self knows neither sorrow nor death, yet within it flow all the relative events. It is easy to be detached when you are not in love. Being in utter love, and yet undisturbed, caring yet not worried, persistent yet not perturbed, are all the obvious signs of the self shining through. 

Let love be. Do not give it a name. When you give love a name it becomes a relationship, and relationships restrict love. There is love between you and me. Just let it be.

If you give love a name, such as brother, sister, mother, father, Guru - you are making it into a relationship. Relationship restricts love. What is your relationship to yourself? Are you your wife, brother, husband, Guru? Let love be. Do not give it a name. When love glows, it is bliss. When it flows, it is compassion. When it blows, it is anger. When it ferments, it is jealousy. When it is all 'no's', it is hatred. When it acts, it is perfection. When love knows, it is me. With whom do you feel really comfortable and at ease? You feel comfortable with someone who does not question your love, someone who takes for granted that you love them. 

If someone doubts your love and you constantly have to prove it, this becomes a heavy load on your head. They start questioning you and demanding explanations for all your actions. Explaining everything you do is a burden. Your nature is to shed the burden, so because you do not feel comfortable. When you question the reason behind an action, you are asking for justice for yourself and you create a distance. Your whole intention is to come close, but by asking for justice you create a distance. When someone asks for an explanation, they are speaking from doership and are imposing that doership on you. This brings discomfort. If someone is just there with you, a part of you, they do not question you. They are like your arm.

There is a closeness and unity that goes beyond all demands and questions. Neither demand an explanation nor give an explanation. You are the eternal witness. You are as much a witness to your own actions as you are to someone else’s actions.

Why does love appear to change?

 

Love is your very nature. What is your nature cannot change. But the expression of love changes. Because love is your nature, you cannot but love. A mother has total love for her child. Sometimes she feeds the child, sometimes she is strict with the child. "Come on, sit and write". She does this out of love, and these are all different modes of love. So the expression of love changes. But love itself does not change, because love is your nature.

When someone expresses love to you, what do you do?

-You do not know how to respond.

-You feel obliged and bound.

-You shrink or shy away.

-You feel foolish and awkward.

-You try to reciprocate even though it is not genuine.

-You doubt the love expressed and you doubt your own worthiness.

-You are afraid of losing respect because love does not allow

distance and respect tends to keep a distance.

-Your ego hardens and does not allow you to receive and

reciprocate.

The ability to receive genuine love comes with the ability to give love. The more you are centered and know by experience that you are love, the more you feel at home with any amount of love being expressed in any manner, for deep inside, you know love is not an emotion. It is your very existence. Joy is love for what is. Sorrow is love for what is not. 

You feel love for someone and they do not accept it. What do you do?

-Get frustrated.

-Turn the love into hatred and wish for revenge.

-Again and again remind them how much you love them and how

little they love you.

-Become fussy and cranky.

-Throw tantrums.

 -Feel humiliated and try to protect your respect.

-Resolve never to love again.

-Feel hurt and mistreated.

-Try to be aloof and indifferent.

But you have seen that none of these work; they only make the situation worse. What is the way out of this? How do you maintain your lovingness?

-Have patience and change your expression of love.

-Be centered and limit your expression of love. Sometimes

expressing too much love puts people off.

-Take it for granted that they love you too and just accept their style of expression. Like a mother with three kids - no one child talks, one child does not talk, one child throws tantrums - her love for each child is constant regardless of their behaviour.

-Genuinely acknowledge whatever love they have for you. This will turn your demand into gratefulness and the more grateful you are in life, the more love comes your way.

-Know that hurt is part of love and take responsibility for it. Realize that when you move away from your center, you will get hurt and the nature of worldliness is misery.

Love the unchanging in another

 

If love is based on the qualities of a person, that love is not stable. After some time, the qualities change and the love becomes shaky. Loving someone because of their greatness or uniqueness is third rate love. Loving someone because they belong to you, great or otherwise, is unconditional love. Knowledge, along with sadhana, seva and satsang, spiritual practice, service, and coming together in celebration help to bring about a sense of belonging. 

When love springs from a sense of belongingness, then the actions and qualities do not overshadow the love. Neither qualities nor actions can be perfect all the time. Only love and a feeling of kinship can be perfect.

When you love someone you see nothing wrong with them. Even if you see a fault in them you justify it in some way “Everyone does that, it is normal”. You think you have not done enough for them and the more you do, the more you want to do for them. 

They are always in your mind. Ordinary things become extraordinary. A baby winking at its grandmother becomes an extraordinary event. You want them to be yours exclusively. You get hurt even over small things. When you love someone, you want to see them always happy and you want them to have the best. You wish someone what they don’t have, right? 

Now, I tell you, now is the best. If you realise this, tomorrow can only be here are some who long for change. Feeling that every thing is stagnant in their lives, they want to change partners, careers, dwellings. There are some who are afraid of change. They feel security in the way they are. There are some who see change, but do not acknowledge it out of fear. 

There are some who do not notice change at all. There are others who do not think there is anything to change. There are some who realise that everything is changing yet see there is something that is non-changing. Those who recognize the non-changing amidst the change are the wisest of all.

Love - out of a sense of kinship

 

I chant the name of my beloved in every breath. The beloved is faultless, perfect. But being in love I have lost my reputation. 

When there is so much love, you take total responsibility for any misunderstanding. For a moment you may express dismay on the surface. But when you do not feel that dismay in your heart, you arrive at a perfect understanding. You are in a state where all problems and all differences slide away and only love shines through. Usually we are stuck in our differences because we have lost sight of ourselves. In the name of love we try to manipulate and control the other person. It is natural that when we love someone, we want them to be perfect.

You can never see the holes in the ground from the top of a hill. From an airplane the earth looks so smooth. So also from a state of elevated consciousness, you do not see the pitfalls in others. But if you come to the ground you always see the holes. When you want to fill the holes, you have to see them. You cannot build a home being airborne. You cannot till the land without looking at the holes, filling them, removing the pebbles. 

That is why when you love someone, you find faults in them. But finding faults destroys love and instead of helping to fill the holes, we run away. When you love someone and see their faults, stay with them and help them fill the holes. This is wisdom. 

Why do you love someone? Is it because of their qualities or because of a sense of kinship or intimacy? You can love someone for their qualities and not feel a sense of kinship. This type of love gives rise to competition and jealousy. Such is not the case when love arises out of kinship. If you love someone for their qualities, when the qualities change or you get accustomed to their qualities, your love also changes. However, if you love someone out of kinship, because they belong to you, then that love remains for lifetimes.

People say, “I love God because He is great”. What if God is found to be ordinary, just one of us? Then your love and God would collapse. If you love God because He is yours, then however God is, whether He creates or destroys, you still love Him. The love of kinship is like love for yourself.

Why does it seem that so many people have no love for themselves? No. It is just the opposite. They love themselves so much that they want better qualities and a better appearance for themselves. This love of qualities makes them hard on themselves.

Mercy is an impediment

 

Mercy indicates lack of intimacy, a distance, a lack of belonging. You do not have mercy on your loved ones. You do not hear parents say, “I have mercy on my children”. 

You have mercy on those whom you think are not yours. Mercy indicates anger, judgment and authority. When you ask for mercy, you are self-centered. You want to be excused from the law of cause and effect. It indicates lack of courage and valor. 

At times, mercy is an impediment to growth. Mercy, of course, brings some comfort and relief, but it can impair transformation. If the leaves were to ask for mercy from falling, they would not be transformed and then what would happen to the tree?

Two of our devotees, high on bliss, did not stop at a stop sign, so the police mercilessly gave them a ticket. Victoria said, “Thank you,” but the policewoman told her to go to court and beg for mercy. You only ask for mercy if you think that God is angry and judging you. This is the small mind superimposing its nature on the Divine mind. The Divine is all knowing and all loving, there is no chance for mercy. When you know and trust the process of creation, you will simply rejoice. Do you know I have no mercy? When there is intimacy, there is no place for mercy.

Eliminating the seeds of karma

 

Some karma can be changed, and some cannot. When you prepare a dessert, if sugar or ghee is too little, you can add more. If some other ingredient is too much, it can all be adjusted and repaired. But once it is cooked, it cannot be reversed. Milk can become sweet yogurt or sour yogurt, and sour yogurt can be sweetened. But neither can be reversed back to milk.

Sanchita karma can be changed and adjusted by spiritual practices. Prarabdha karma cannot be changed. And satsang burns the seed of all negative karmas before they are given a chance to sprout. Strange are the ways of karma. The more you understand it, the more amazed you become. Karma brings people together and separates them. It causes some to be weak and some to be strong. It makes some rich and some poor.

All the struggles in the world, whatever they may be, are the bondage of karma. It cuts across all logic and reasoning. This understanding lifts you and keeps you from getting stuck in events or personalities and helps you in your journey to the self.

So, can a thief say it is my karma to steal? Yes, and then the police have the karma to catch him, too. Only human life has the ability to be free from karma and only a few thousand aim to be free from it. Performing actions cannot eliminate karma. Only through grace can the bondage of karma be burnt.

Two types of compassion

Compassion can be of 2 types. One is the compassion of the wise, one is that of the ignorant. An ignorant person’s compassion is toward the fruit of an action to alleviate the sickness or suffering that he witnesses. But a wise person’s compassion is toward the lack of knowledge to remedy the underlying reason for sickness or suffering. Compassion for suffering shows ignorance. 

Suffering comes because of karma and if you believe in karma, where is compassion? You reap the fruit of your actions. If a judge has compassion for offenders, then the jails will be empty. But are judges cruel to offenders? No. The judge’s compassion is for the lack of knowledge he sees, not for the suffering of the criminals. It is the criminals’ karma.

Often people think compassion is an act, an action. Know that compassion is your very nature. Then you will see that karma and compassion are not contradictory but rather complement one another. Suppose two people come to a hospital. One is suffering from starvation, the other is ill from overeating. What type of compassion should the doctor have toward each of them? This is a riddle for you to solve.

Combine sensitivity with strength

 

Those who are sensitive often feel weak. Those who think themselves strong are often insensitive. Some are sensitive to themselves but insensitive to others. Some are sensitive to others but not to themselves. Those who are sensitive only to themselves often blame others. Those who are only sensitive to others often end up feeling self-pity. Some conclude it is better not to be sensitive at all because sensitivity brings pain, so they shut themselves off from others. But if you are not sensitive, you will lose all the finer things too like, intuition, beauty, and ecstasy of love.

This path and this knowledge make you both sensitive and strong. Often people who are insensitive do not recognize their insensitivity. And those who are sensitive often do not recognize sensitivity is their strength.

Sensitivity is intuition, sensitivity is compassion, sensitivity is love. Sensitivity is real strength. Strength is calmness, endurance, silence, non-reactiveness, confidence, faith and a smile. Be both sensitive and strong.

Virtues are already present in you

 

Virtues cannot be cultivated. You must assume that they are there. In the Bhagvad Gita, Krishna said to Arjuna, “Grieve not Arjuna, you are born with virtues. “The seeker should remember that he is born with virtues, otherwise he would not be a seeker. If you think you have no virtues and then try to cultivate them, you will fail. 

When you think you do not have a virtue, then you come from a space of lack or deficiency. You compare yourself with others on the basis of virtues. Do not compare yourself with anyone. Simply recognize all the virtues you appreciate in others and realize that those virtues are present in you in seed form. You only have to nurture them.

Virtues must be practiced until they become your nature. Friendliness, compassion and meditation should continue as practices until you realize that they are your very nature. The flaw in doing something as an act is that you look for a result. When something is done as your nature, you are not attached to the result and you simply do it. An action that arises from your nature is neither tiring nor frustrating. 

Daily routines like brushing your teeth or bathing are not even considered actions because they are so integrated into your life. You do all this without doership. When seva is made part of your nature, it happens without doership. Wise men continue their practices just to set an example, even though for them there is no need for any practices.

Need to feel indebted

 

God is all abundant, all full and we are connected to God. Then why are people in debt? Why do some have while some do not? Is it only money you lack? When you say you are indebted, that means you have received something.

Otherwise, how can you be indebted? Those who have received should feel indebted. Be thankful for having received. The more abundance you have, the more indebted you will feel. And when you feel indebted and grateful, more abundance comes to you.

Feel indebted. Feel grateful. Then abundance grows. Abundance and indebtedness coexist. You think you are indebted, but really you are not. Yet it is better to feel totally indebted, because every bit of what you have, including your body, does not belong to you. When you are infinitely indebted for your body, for knowledge, for things you have received, and for your own life, then you bask in the abundance of the Creator.

Transcending gratefulness

 

Which is better, to thank deeply or superficially? Everyone will say in unison, deeply. No, it is superficially!

Thanking needs a separation. Thanking means there are two. If you are deeply thankful, it means you deeply feel the separation. Deep within there is no need to thank because there is oneness. But you can thank superficially. Thanks are like ripples on the surface of water. When you say “thank you”, you complete something. You are finishing a transaction, a relationship, a process. “Thank you” is like “goodbye”.

You can complete all transactions at a surface level, but deeper inside there is only oneness. Thankfulness always exists in relation to something else. You do not thank for nothing at all, you thank for something. But in this case, something is less than nothing. At the deepest level, thanking has no meaning. Does one hand thank the other hand? The deeper you go, you see there is no “other” to be thanked.

Feeling is also superficial. If you think the feeling is the depth, then you have not gone deep. Feeling is deeper than thinking. But feelings change. Whatever is the deepest doesn’t change. So thank superficially, not from the depth. Deep thanks indicate deep separation. Today is a gift from God, that is why it is called the present. Are you grateful? If you are grateful, you do not belong to God. When someone gives you something, you are grateful, that means you feel separate. 

You do not feel grateful to yourself. Gratefulness means you do not feel part of the Master. When you go beyond gratefulness, then union happens. No. “I” no “you” remains. You are part of the Master. You are just one being with a thousand heads and a thousand arms, but with one heart. Gratefulness is inevitable. You have got to be grateful on the path, but you have to transcend gratefulness. Better stop being grateful.

You are not grateful to your own hand that feeds you. It is better to stop being grateful. When you are grateful then you become the centre of attention, you feel more important. When you are grateful to God for having received something beautiful, for example, eyesight, who is important? You or God? You. Your gratitude indicates ego.

Don’t be grateful just be great and be full. This knowledge could be dangerous without devotion.

How appreciation can lead to separateness

 

When do you appreciate someone? Don’t you appreciate them when they do something that is unusual, not ordinary, something that is not their nature? When a wicked person fails to cause problems, you appreciate them. Or when someone you think is not good performs a good deed, you appreciate them. When a good person does something extraordinary, you appreciate them. If a child makes you a cup of tea, you appreciate it, but if a mother made the same cup of tea, you are less likely to appreciate it because it is a normal act for her.

In the same way, you appreciate getting a ride from someone you do not know, but you may not appreciate it from a bus driver. In all these cases, the acts you praise are temporary, out of character, or not in the nature of that person. So when you appreciate someone for something, you imply that it is not the way they usually are.

Now, what hat if a person wants to be appreciated? That means that the act is not in their nature, and that is why they want to be appreciated. If it is not coming from their nature, it is an imposed act. So when you appreciate someone you imply that it is not their nature, that it is not the way they usually are. It is a rare act or quality. Appreciation implies a sense of separateness or distance, so watch out when you appreciate someone.

Real praise and the consciousness

 

Often when you praise, you praise in comparison to someone else. In order to praise one person, we put down someone else and when we want to point out someone’s mistake, we praise another. Some praise too little, and some are too shy to praise.

Some are not accustomed to praising and just forget to do so. Some praise with motives, and some praise just to elevate. Others praise themselves in order to hide their low self-esteem. 

But real praise dawns in a blossomed state of consciousness. The praise that comes out of an elevated state of consciousness simply arises from the nature of consciousness and is quite different.

Normally praise comes out of craving and pride. Praise that comes from a heightened consciousness always comes out of a sense of fulfilment. Praising can elevate the consciousness and bring enthusiasm and energy. But at the same time, it can bring arrogance. Praising is a skill. Take it without shying. When someone praises you do you take it without shying away? Accepting praise without shyness is also a skill.

Significance of loyalty

 

Loyalty is the way in which a mature and integrated mind behaves. Loyalty signifies an undivided wholeness of consciousness and shows a richness of the mind. When the mind is not integrated it is feverish, disloyal and opportunistic. Disloyalty comes out of opportunism which reveals shortsightedness of one’s destiny. Integrity or wholeness is essential to being healthy. A divided mind will gradually lead to schizophrenia and other mental and physical disorders. Loyalty is a real strength and will have the support of nature in the long run.

Fear and ambition are impediments to loyalty. Loyalty is needed both in the material and the spiritual plane. Loyalty is essential to destroy, create or maintain any institution, group or society. Loyalty means believing in the continuity of commitment. Honouring commitment is loyalty. It takes you beyond the duality of craving and aversion. Responsibility, dedication and commitment are the limbs of loyalty.

A loyal mind is a ‘yes’ mind. The purpose of asking questions is to get an answer. The purpose of all answers is to create a ‘yes’. ‘Yes’ is an acknowledgement knowledge. The ‘yes’ mind is quiet, holistic and joyful. The ‘no’ mind is agitated, doubting and miserable. Loyalty begins with a ‘yes’ mind and starts to perish with a ‘no’ mind.

Do not respect greatness and don't expect respect

 

Why do you respect someone? You respect them because of good qualities such as honesty, wisdom, love and talents. But all these change in time and when they change, you lose respect. You only respect greatness. I have tremendous respect for each and every one of you. Not for your greatness or wisdom or talent, but for the very person you are. I respect everyone totally, so I can never lose respect for anybody, however they may be.

Someone does not need to be great in order to be respected. Respecting life makes you great. Do not look for respect from others, that makes you weak. Have respect for the self and no one can take your self-respect. When others respect you, it is not because you possess some virtues. It is because of their greatness. If you say God is great, it means you are great. God is already great, your saying so does not affect God.

When you respect someone, it only shows your own magnanimity. However many people you do not respect in the world, that much less is your wealth. If you respect everyone in the world, that much more is your value. Wise is the one who respects everyone.

Now, how can you respect a terrorist or a criminal? You should respect a terrorist too because he shows you the way at his own cost. Respectfulness is a quality of refined consciousness. Respect for the self is faith and faith is being open.

Respect everyone as you respect me, but do not expect from everyone what you expect from me. You usually do it the other way. You do not respect everyone as you respect me, but you expect them to give you joy and you expect them to behave ideally.

When they do not live up to your expectations, you get frustrated, and you blame or curse them. By cursing, you lose your spiritual energy. When you can bless, your energy goes up. The world is full of differences, arguments are inevitable. With forbearance, patience and wisdom, skillfully make your way. If you find fools around you, they will make you wiser. The number of fools around you indicates the strength of your centeredness. 

Do not try to get rid of them. If you are not centered, you will not have the patience to endure them. When you are totally established, you find that even fools come up with wisdom. They are your own reflection, there is no other. Fools offer you frustration or wisdom and make your life juicy.

How can you stop thinking that others are fools? You don’t have to. You can see all the people in the whole world as fools. The advantage is that you don’t get attached to fools. Otherwise, if you think people are sane, you will want to join them. You can think everybody is a fool and be cool.

Thank those who do not respect you. They have given you freedom. When people respect you, they often take away your freedom. They expect you to smile at them, recognize them, and behave in a certain way with them. If they do not respect you, you are not obliged to answer their questions and you can drop all formalities.

You can naturally smile or frown – you can be complete. When people love and respect you, you are obliged to return their courtesies because you do not want to hurt them. But when they do not respect or love you, they will not be hurt by your expressions. They set you free. When you gain respect, you often do it at the cost of your freedom. Wisdom is to put freedom first and not bother with respect. 

True freedom is not an “I don’t care” attitude, it is not stiff. It is an inner lightness with a genuine smile. When someone is stiff and arrogant, they are not free. Love blossoms only in freedom. When there is love, respect simply follows you.

Lying and love

 

A dear person whom you trust lies to you and gets caught. What do you feel? Feel cheated, sad, angry, disappointed, compassionate, disillusioned, wonder, shock, embarrassment, loss of respect? Recently when someone lied to me, I felt happy and more love, for he was not a good liar.

Had he been a good liar, he would not have been caught. He was so innocent that he could not even lie properly. If he had not been caught, how would you know he was a liar? So you see, you can never know a good liar.

The person you call a liar is not a good liar, she or he is innocent. So when someone lies to you, there is no need to go through all the above listed mental gymnastics. Instead, just melt and dissolve in love.

Overcoming hurdles raised by politics

 

Do not let politics sway you away from the path. If you are afraid of politics, you cannot be successful in the spiritual path. You have to cross the barricade of politics. It is a test of your strength, your commitment and your focus. 

You cannot avoid politics, whether to harbour politics in your mind is your choice. There was politics among the twelve apostles and also around Buddha. Krishna was in politics from head to toe. And you say you do not want politics? The greater your aversion, the more you will harbor it in your consciousness.

When you recognize politics in any group, it is a blessing for you to be centred and to go inward. You can do that without blaming the group, without running away from people, without giving up. It can enhance your skill to act while being unattached. 

There are many advantages to becoming involved in politics. Politics amplify the diversity in people. It confronts you with different viewpoints, approaches and tendencies. It enhances your skill to communicate and act. It brings centeredness and dispassion. It shakes you up and makes you apply the knowledge. It enhances your capacity to accept and tolerate. It makes you realise that all of life is a game. The strong will smile through the politics and the weak will lament. Cross the threshold of politics and come to the divine.

Handling rude behaviour

 

What do you do when someone is rude to you?

• Get upset.
• React rudely.
• Become frustrated.
• Run away from the person or avoid the situation in the future.
• Blame the person.
• Preach to the person.

None of these will in any way strengthen you. What are the options? See someone’s rude behavior in this light:

• Rudeness indicates the intensity of their commitment.
• It indicates their level of stress and insensitivity. It attests to the upbringing of the person.
• It indicates a behavioral pattern.
• It shows a lack of knowledge.
• It shows a lack of insight into their own mind and its sensations.
• It shows you behaviour to avoid.
• It is an opportunity for you to welcome and absorb the rudeness.
• It strengthens your mind. It reveals the love that you are as unconditional.

The next time someone is rude to you, make sure you do not get upset. Just return a broad smile. If you can digest rudeness, nothing whatsoever can shake you.

Way out of humiliation

 

Know that humiliation does not weaken you, it strengthens you. When you have a sense of belongingness, you cannot feel humiliated. The more egotistic you are, the more humiliation you feel. When you are childlike and have a greater sense of kinship, you do not feel humiliated.

Similarly when you are committed to truth and not to your ego, you do not feel humiliated. If you are afraid of humiliation, you can make progress in neither your material life nor in your spiritual life. When you stand above humiliation, you get closer to the self to God.

When you are steeped in love, with existence, with the divine, nothing whatsoever can humiliate you. So the way out of humiliation is to get humiliated, be childlike, be crazy, get steeped in love with the divine, totally commit to truth, to knowledge.

Conquering jealousy

 

There are many ways to conquer the jealousy or envy that may arise in you:

1. That the person of whom you are jealous or envious has done some good deeds in the past and is now reaping the fruit.

2. See jealousy or envy as an inspiration to gain merit for yourself.

3. Create a sense of belongingness with those of whom you are envious. See them as a part of you.

4. Think of all you have that they do not have and feel grateful.

5. Simply observe the sensations. Join hands and form a team with them.

6. Realise that in the current of moving time, all will perish. Go and ask them, “Are you happy?”

If their answer is “Yes” then they must be in the Art of Living. 

And how do you handle jealousy in others?

1. Think of everyone who is jealous of you for what you have and see that what they envy has not brought you joy.

2. Praise them with superlatives.

3. Create a sense of belongingness in them by your kind actions.

4. Know that their feelings are temporary.

5. It is best not to recognize their envy or jealousy at all. If you recognize a feeling as reality, it only makes your ignorance grow.

6. Know that all feelings and emotions are just passing clouds.

7. Do not flaunt your talents to them.

8. Know that they are puppets. They will all perish like apples and tomatoes – just with a longer shelf life.

9. If nothing else works, just go to sleep.

Dealing with skeptics

 

Ignorance is being a skeptic and not knowing that you are one. If you think you are a skeptic, you are no longer a skeptic. You already have a clue of something beyond. So, in reality, you can never know if you are a skeptic or not. 

A skeptic is stuck in a paradigm, closing all other possibilities. But this creation has all possibilities. As one understands how paradigms shift, skepticism is dropped. A real scientist can never afford to be a skeptic because skepticism will not probe into unknown areas of existence. Skepticism is an “I know it all” attitude, and such an attitude is unscientific. Skepticism is dispelled by knowledge.

Do not recognize someone’s skepticism and try to argue. Arguments only strengthen skepticism. Fear of losing one’s freedom brings more resistance and causes more skepticism. Deep inside every human being there is faith and love. Skepticism is only a thin layer. If you hold in your mind, "This person is a skeptic", you only empower his or her skepticism.

Your silence and the smile from your heart will dispel any skepticism. There is nothing better than silence to break it. Silence means a quality of consciousness, not just keeping your lips tight. Skepticism comes only in people who walk with boundaries. Children have no skepticism. They live in their fantasy worlds, worlds of many possibilities. Their worlds are of innocence, joy, beauty, and love.

Why we need enemies

 

In the company of your friend, you lose your centredness. It is your enemy that puts you back in your Self. 

Your friend sympathizes with you and makes you believe in matter. Your enemy makes you feel helpless and takes you to the spirit. Your enemy is your friend and your friend is your enemy. 

In the Bhagwad Gita, Krishna said to Arjuna, “One who is unfriendly everywhere, including to himself, his consciousness is stable and his awareness is established.”

Being judgmental, or not

 

Though you have often heard “do not judge” judgment comes unavoidably in day-to-day life. You either approve or disapprove of the actions and behaviour of people. But always remember that everything changes, so do not hold onto your judgment, otherwise your judgment becomes solidified like a rock, bringing misery for you and for others.

If judgments are light as air, like a breeze, they bring in fragrance, and then move away. They can also bring a foul smell but then they also move away. Judgments should not stay forever. Judgments are so subtle that you are not even aware of their existence. Labelling someone as judgmental is also a judgment.

Only in the state of being, when you are full of love and compassion, can you ever be free from all judgments. Yet the world cannot move without judgments. Until you judge something as good or bad, you cannot perform any actions. If you see rotten apples in the market, you refuse to buy them. You buy only good apples. If someone lies to you ten times, the next time they speak you think it could also be a lie.

A judgment happens on its own automatically. But see the possibility that people and things can change at any time and do not hold onto your judgments. Of course, you need to judge your company. Your company can pull you up or drag you down. The company that drags you towards doubt, dejection, blame, complaints, anger, delusion and desires is bad company. 

The company that pulls you up towards joy, enthusiasm, service, love, trust and knowledge is good company. When someone complains, first you listen, then you nod, then you sympathise, then you too complain. The company you keep, can create hell for you in heaven, or heaven for you in hell. Judge for yourself.

Toleration vs love

 

Neither accept people as they are nor tolerate them. Many people think tolerance is a virtue but tolerance is actually a negative term. If you like something, you do not have to tolerate it. Tolerance indicates a deep sense of dislike. It indicates a sense of separateness, small mindedness, limited awareness. 

When you are tolerating, it means you are temporarily putting up with it. Tolerance is a potential volcano. If you are tolerating, it means you are still holding on to something. Acceptance is also negative. You accept only that which is not lovable.

Do you need self-assurance to love people? Only the self is assuring, nothing else. This is our company - The Self Assurance Company.

But aren't we supposed to accept people as they are? If you do not love them, then you have to accept them. I tell you, do not accept people as they are, just love them as they are. Tolerance and acceptance come with judgment and separation.

Handling your own ego

The “I” or ego in you is a tiny atom. If this atom is associated with the body, with matter, it identifies with matter. If this atom is associated with the being, the infinite, it identifies with the infinite self. When this atom, this ego, identifies with the material world, it becomes miserable. But when it is associated with the spirit, it becomes Divine. It becomes shakti, energy, when it is associated with the being, the Self.

It becomes miserable when identified with the body. In a huge atomic reactor, it is just one atom that is exploded. In the same way, in our whole body there is just one atom of “I”. And when this “I” explodes, it becomes the light of the self. Usually we say “I am miserable”, or “I’m happy”. Shift this atom of ego from identifying with the body and the conceptual world, to identifying with the real world.

When you think well of yourself, in a very subtle way, you think badly about others. Then anger, jealousy and hatred follow. When you think badly about yourself, you feel low and again you become angry and you hate others. When you think well of yourself , you are in trouble and when you think badly of yourself, you are in greater trouble. So, drop your self-image. When is there ego?

1. When you don’t get attention.

2. When you seem to be losing attention.

3. When you get attention.

Ego causes heaviness, discomfort, fear, anxiety. Ego does not let love flow. Ego is separateness, non-belongingness, wanting to prove and to possess. Ego can be transcended by knowing the truth, by inquiring “Who am I?” Often, you feel contempt or jealousy towards someone with ego. Instead you should have compassion. There is also a positive aspect of ego.

Ego drives you to do work. A person will do a job either out of joy, compassion or out of ego. Most of the work in society is done out of ego. But in satsangs, work is done out of love. Ego is separateness and non-belongingness. It desires to prove and to possess. When you wake up and see that there is nothing to be proven and nothing to possess, ego dissolves. 

Transcending sorrow

 

The only thing you must remember is how fortunate you are. When you forget this, you become sad. Sorrow indicates your attachment to your negative qualities as well as your attachment to your positive qualities. Your negative qualities make you sad. And when you think you are so great, you start blaming others, this also makes you become sad. The purpose of sorrow is to bring you back to the Self. And the Self is all joy. But this realization is possible only through knowledge - through awareness.

Knowledge or awareness leads sorrow towards the Self. Without knowledge, the same sorrow multiplies and does not get completed. Knowledge completes sorrow. Only with the power of knowledge do you transcend sorrow. In this path you have everything. You have this beautiful knowledge that has all flavours - wisdom, laughter, seva, silence, singing, dancing humour, celebrating, yagnas, caring, complaints, problems, complications - and chaos to add colour. Life is so colourful. 

It is only through merit that you can have faith. When you lack faith, there can be no happiness in either the inner or the outer world. Happiness springs from faith. Happiness is forgetting the body consciousness. Pain or sorrow is holding on to body consciousness. When you are happy, you do not feel the body and when you are miserable, you have aches and pains.

Often in guided meditation, one's attention is taken to various parts of the body. For an arrow to go forward, it must be pulled back. In the same way when you take attention to the various parts of the body, that process frees you from body consciousness.

If you are unhappy, check if any of these are lacking - tapas or penance, vairagya or dispassion, sharanagati or surrender. Tapas is agreeing with the moment, a total acceptance of pleasant or unpleasant situations. Vairagya means “I want nothing” and “I am nothing”. Sharanagati is "I am here for you, for your joy”.

If you are grumbling, it is because these are lacking in your life. When you accept your situation you cannot grumble, when you take it as tapas you will not grumble. When you come from a state of dispassion - “I do not want anything”, you do not grumble, and if you are surrendered you will have no complaints.

If you do not do it willingly, you will do it later out of desperation. First you will say, “Nothing can be done”. Then in anger and desperation you will say, “I give up, I want nothing, I have no choice, to hell with it”. All three of these - penance, dispassion and surrender, purify your mind and uplift you in joy.

There is no problem that cannot be solved. When you have a problem that you think cannot be solved, you have accepted it. Then it is no longer a problem, it is a fact. Suppose you think it is a problem that the ocean in Norway is too cold. Obviously, you cannot heat the ocean. So it cannot be changed, you accept it, and it is no longer a problem. Only when you are searching for a solution is there a problem. Thus there is no problem that cannot be solved.

The moment you realise there is no solution, a problem ceases to be a problem. The solution is the tail of every problem. Solutions comes to you when you are calm and collected, when you use intelligence, when you are not lethargic but active, and when you have strong faith in divine law.

Mind, memory, misery

 

Memory make you miserable or wise. Memory of experiences and events in the ever-changing world, however good or bad constrict the vastness of the Self. They bind you. Memory of your nature, the non-changing self, expands and elevates awareness. This liberates you. You are what you are because of your memory. If you are ignorant, it is because of your memory. If you are enlightened, it is because of your memory. Forgetfulness of the infinite is misery. Forgetfulness of the trivial is ecstasy.

Now, how do we get rid of unpleasant memories and limitations? Know the impermanent nature of the world and events. Realise that past events do not exist in the present. Accept the past and drop it. Be dispassionate and centred. Memory of the Self is gained in the company and service of the Enlightened. “So Hum” increases prana or “So What?”, if nothing works, go to God. When you are miserable, know that you have gone away from the self. This is called ashaucha, becoming unclean. 

In India when someone dies, the close relatives are said to be ashaucha for 10 days because they are very sad. They are impure because they have moved away from the self. After 10 days of just living through that experience and reading the Bhagavad Gita, being with the knowledge and pulling themselves back into the Self, they become shaucha. They have purged the impurities that arose during those events.

This happens again and again in life. You become ashaucha and then you must get back to shaucha. Go deeper into yourself; then real shaucha happens. Shaucha’s benefits are clarity in the intellect, a pleasing mind, focused awareness, control over the senses and thus eligibility to realize the Self. Shaucha is disinterest in the tendencies of your own senses. 

You have the understanding, “Oh yes, here is this old familiar tendency again. Come on, I have had this experience enough, and still my body craves for it again”. By being disinterested for a moment in one's own body and senses – just an idea, a sort of distaste, you will find that the situation changes. 

Why do people love each other so much, have such an intimate relationship, and then fight? Ashaucha has happened. If you do not have distaste for the tendency of the senses, then distaste for the object of the senses is bound to come and you will blame the person or object.

Your attraction or craving can exist only as long as you think someone is “other”. When you think they are a part of you or your self, then the attraction dies out. That is why a husband or a wife may not be attracted to their partner but to someone else, because their partner has already become a part of them. When you realize everyone is part of your Self, you enjoy the whole world without a sense of craving.

When ashaucha happens, quickly come back to shaucha. Suppose you feel drowned in any worldly event, just know this is ashaucha - know “that is why I am miserable”. Then come back to shaucha. Your spiritual practices, meditation, Sudarshan Kriya, seva (service), and Satsang will all help you. When you share your misery, it does not reduce. When you do not share your joy, it reduces. Share your problems only with the Divine, not with anyone else, as that will only increase the problems. Share your joy with everyone.

How do we help people who share their misery with us? I have a thousand and one ways. Often it happens that when they share their problem with me, it is immediately resolved. Other times it requires some patience. Just know that all will be taken care of. Listen to others, yet do not listen. If your mind gets stuck in their problems, not only are they miserable, but you also become miserable. Be caring and share with them the knowledge.

The mind lives on “more”. Misery starts with “more and more” and misery makes you dense and gross. The self is subtle. To go from gross to subtle, you must go through the finest level of the relative, the atom. To overcome aversion, hatred, jealousy, attraction or entanglements, you have to take yourself to the atom. Taking yourself to the atom means accepting a tiny bit of all of this. It may be difficult to accept something you do not like but you can definitely accept a tiny bit of an atom. 

The moment you accept that one atom, you will see change occur. But this must be done in a meditative state. Suppose you love someone. You want more and more of them, yet there is no fulfilment. In anuvrat, the vow of an atom, you take just one atom of that person and that is enough to bring fulfilment to you. Though the river is vast, a little sip quenches your thirst. Though the earth has so much food, just a small bite satisfies your hunger. All that you need are tiny bits. Accept a tiny bit of everything in life, that will bring you fulfilment.

Life is eternal

 

Death brings you in touch with the reality of life. Death creates a vacuum, a void and this void is fertile ground for the spirit to manifest. All talents, inventions and creativity spring forth from the void, creation has a tendency to return to the void. All places of worship in all religions are connected with places of burial or cremation because only the awareness of death can bring dispassion and can ground you in knowledge.

According to Indian mythology, Shiva abides in both Mount Kailasa and in smashana. Kailasa means 'where there is only celebration' and smashana is the cremation ground - 'where there is only void'. Divinity dwells in the void as well as in celebration. In you there is void, in you there is celebration. 

The realisation that life is very short brings dynamism in your life. Unwanted things will fall off as well as distractions. When you have to act or put an effort, know that life is short. When you realize life is short, procrastination falls away. When you are expecting a result, know that life is eternal. The ignorant person does it the other way - he hurries for the result and is impatient and frustrated. 

Impatience goes away when you know that life is eternal. When you are looking for a return of a favour or a result from your good deed, you want it quickly. But when you know that there are many lifetimes, you realize that if you don’t get it sooner, you get it later.

Wake up and see your life is too short. Time is running out, so what are you doing with your life? Is it being useful to you and the world around you? Realise life is too short. Wake up and see life is eternal. When you want to enjoy the fruit of action, know that life is eternal. When it comes to hope, you should know that there are many lifetimes. 

When you are looking for results, know that time is eternal. If someone doesn't thank you or takes advantage of you, thank them because they will pay you back later with interest. No one needs to feel sorry that they are unappreciated or have been taken advantage of. Know that you will have to be paid back in the future with interest. 

When it comes to enjoying the fruit of your actions, good deeds or even blessings, know that life is eternal. Anytime that you are in a hurry, you cannot enjoy. So, know that life is eternal.

Waking up from depression

 

Lack of idealism is the main cause of depression among young people today. Life appears to be so meaningless to these children, who are either too scared of the competitive world or bogged down by heavy stimuli. They need inspiration, and spirituality is that inspiration that can keep the spirit up.

Depression sets in if there is a lack of zeal to fight. Aggression is the antidote to depression. Depression is lack of energy. Anger and aggression are bolts of energy. When Arjuna was depressed, Krishna inspired him to fight and thus reinstated life back into him. 

If you are depressed, do not take Prozac - just fight for any cause. If aggression crosses a certain limit, it leads you back into depression. That is what happened when King Ashoka won the Kalinga War - he became depressed. He had to take refuge in Buddha. 

Wise are those who do not fall either into aggression or depression. That is the golden rule of a yogi. Just wake up and acknowledge you are a yogi.

Sound of non-violence needs to heard

 

Violence comes with noise while non-violence happens in silence. People who are violent make tremendous noise, they make their violence known, while people who are nonviolent are quiet. But the time has come for the nonviolent ones to make noise so that violence will quiet down. The message of non-violence must come loud and clear so that it can be heard at a young age.

A sense of shame has to be connected with anger and violence. The reason for violence in young people is a sense of pride in anger and violence, not a sense of shame. People feel proud that they are violent or angry. They think it is prestigious or a status symbol to be aggressive.

Aggression is not considered a quality to be ashamed of. This promotes aggression and violence in the whole society, and when aggression and violence are promoted, human values diminish. Some movies and modern music glorify frustration, anger, and revenge and make these a role model for children.

We need to promote human values loudly and clearly, especially love, compassion and a sense of belongingness. Speak to groups or through your local media in the newspaper and on TV and conduct as many Utkarsha Yoga and other Art of Living courses in your area as possible.

If people are ashamed to be angry, won't that keep them unnatural and set up resistance in them that will persist? If they are not ashamed, they will feel they have a license to get angry and violent. Sometimes resistance is a good thing, like resistance to disease or resistance to bad habits. Life is a war. Doctors fight against disease. Lawyers fight against injustice. Teachers fight against ignorance. Even your body is a battlefield. Depression happens when you lose the will to fight.

Arjuna was depressed, he did not want to fight. His bow fell from his hands and his fingers trembled but Krishna urged him to wake up and fight. The decision to fight can take away your depression.

Aggression vs. Assertiveness

 

Often people are soft from lack of courage and forcefulness. They suffer a lot, and at some time or other they become volatile. Yet there are some people who possess a softness that comes from maturity, magnanimity, and the knowledge of the self. 

Similarly, there are 2 types of forcefulness in people, aggressive and assertive. Aggressive people are forceful out of weakness or out of fear. Assertive people are forceful out of care, love, and compassion.

So look into yourself and become aware of what type of softness and what type of forcefulness is in you. Aggression and assertiveness overshadow intuition. Often people who are sensitive tend to become aggressive, in order to avoid being hurt and in this process, they lose sight of their fine intuition. Fine intuition needs sensitivity, but sensitivity is often painful. 

In order to avoid pain they become aggressive and assertive, and in turn they lose their intuitive ability. Intuition is close to the truth. Often aggression and assertiveness thrive on the idea of truthfulness, aggressive people are convinced of the rightness of their position. To be truthful, you do not need to be aggressive or assertive.

Finding comfort in conflict

 

When you are in a harmonious environment your mind picks up any excuse to be in conflict. Often, small things are enough to create a big turmoil. When your survival is at stake, you do not complain that nobody loves you. But when you are safe and feel secure, you start demanding attention. Many people create conflict in order to get attention. 

Ask yourself this question. Do you seek harmony in every situation or do you seek to widen the differences and prove your righteousness? 

The seed of negativity and the tendency for conflict in you can only be annihilated by sadhana, i.e. spiritual practices. Only speak knowledge. Do not repeat anything bad that someone tells you about someone else. When someone comes to tell you negative things, discourage them. Do not believe it. If someone blames you directly, do not believe it. Just know that they are taking away your bad karma and let it go. 

If you are one of the master’s close ones, you will take all the blame of the world with a smile. When you blame someone, you take on their bad karma, when you praise someone, you take on their good karma. Surrender both good and bad karma to the Divine – and be free. Conflict is the nature of the world, comfort is the nature of the Self. 

Amidst conflict, find the comfort. When you are tired of conflicts and the games of the world, get into the comforts of the Self. When you are bored with comfort, get into the games of the world. If you are one of the Master’s close ones, you do both simultaneously. People who love peace do not want to fight, and those who fight do not have peace. What is needed is to be peaceful within and then fight. 

Just trying to end a conflict only prolongs it. Instead, face the conflict while seeking the comfort of the Self. This is the whole message of the Bhagvad Gita. Krishna tells Arjuna to be centered in peace and to fight at the same time. 

God is alive in the world and has been putting up with all conflicts throughout the ages. If God can put up with all these conflicts, you can too. And the moment you agree to be with a conflict, it no longer appears as a conflict to you. The nature of this world is that once you resolve one conflict, another arises. For example, Russia is solved and then Bosnia is in trouble. Or you get a cold, then you get better, then your back hurts, then it gets better. And when your body is fine, then the mind goes. Things in this world run this way, don’t they? 

Without any intention, misunderstandings simply happen and conflicts arise. It’s not up to you to resolve them. Just be with them and be alive.

Resistance & persistance

 

Do you welcome all that comes to you or do you resist everything? If you cannot resist anything, you cannot welcome anything. You cannot resist everything and you cannot welcome everything. You do not welcome all thoughts that come to your mind. When you welcome a thought, it means you find it good and act on it. If you act on all thoughts that come to your mind, you will end up in a mental hospital or in prison.

So, you resist or ignore some thoughts and you welcome other thoughts. You need discrimination in life. Welcoming and resisting is a swing in life. Welcoming is essential for expansion and growth, and resistance is essential for maintenance.

But what you resist persists, isn’t it? If you resist a cold, it does not persist. If there is no resistance in your body, you cannot survive. Your body resists some things and welcomes other things. Where resistance is weak, persistence results. Weak resistance makes opposition persist. 

A strong resistance erases the opposition. Strong resistance leads to valour, power and samadhi, equanimity. It brings in you the strength of a warrior. Nothing can tempt you, nothing can obstruct you, and victory is gained without fighting. Where there is strong resistance or total welcome, victory is gained without any fighting.

Handling negativity

 

Negativity cannot remain without a support. Positivity and happiness can exist without any reason. 

The mind goes on trying to find a support for its negativity. It looks for a hook on which to hang its negativity, if not this person, then that thing or that person. This perpetuates maya. The creeping vine of negativity needs support in order to grow. But negativity or aversion for even one person can guarantee a one-way ticket to hell, you need nothing else.

All negativity is an indicator for you to move to your centre and to broaden your vision to cosmic intelligence. Instead of focusing your attention on a support for your negativity, look at the seed of the negativity. 

With meditation, silence and Sudarshan Kriya, the source of negativity is nipped at the root.

Don't fight blame

 

When you follow fun, misery follows you. When you follow knowledge, fun follows you.

When a worldly man is miserable, he blames the people around him, the system and the world in general. When a seeker is miserable, he blames the world, but in addition he blames the path, the knowledge and himself. It is better not to be a seeker so that you blame less. But then a seeker, a sadhak, also enjoys everything much more. There is more love in life and more pain. 

When there is more joy, the contrast is greater. A certain level of maturity is needed to see things as they are and not blame the path, the self and the world. If one jumps across this chasm of blame and misery, then there is no fall. It is like a quantum leap. 

The Divine does not test you. Testing is part of ignorance. Who is it that will put something to a test? Only one who does not know something. God knows your capacity, so why should He have to test you? Then, why is there misery? It is for titiksha, forbearance in you. And forbearance can be increased by prayerful surrender and by things that vigorously challenge your patience.

When someone blames you, what do you usually do? You blame them back or you set up some resistance in yourself. How do you feel when someone blames you? Hurt, unhappy, sad, heavy? This is all because you are resisting. What you resist, persists. You get hurt because you resist the blame. Know that when someone blames you, they take away some negative karma from you. 

If you understand this, you will only feel happy about it. If you resist when someone blames you, you are not allowing them to take away the negative karma. Even if you don’t react outwardly, you may still be resisting inside. Actually, it’s fine to resist outside, but inside don’t resist. You will feel immediately lighter. You can feel happy - Oh, good, somebody is blaming me and taking some of my negative karma.

The ignorant person says, “Don’t blame me” because it hurts him. An enlightened person also says, “Don’t blame me”. Do you know why? Because it might hurt you. You can tell someone not to blame you out of anger or out of compassion.

The way out of confusion

 

Decision comes only when there is confusion. When there is no confusion, there is no need of a decision. If there is a piece of wood and a biscuit on your desk, do you decide which one to eat? A decision is always about choice and choice is always confusing. The more decisions, the more confused you are, swinging always between pain and pleasure. So, all decision makers are confused. Are you confused, decided or happy? When you are confused there is no freedom.

Action is spontaneous when there is no actor. In you, there is an actor and there is a witness. An actor is either confused or decisive, but the witness just observes and smiles. The more decisions you make, the more confused you are, and as a result you swing between pain and pleasure. The more the witness grows in you, the more playful and untouched you are. Trust, faith, love and joy all manifest in and around you.

How to handle doubts

 

Doubt cannot come where there is a sense of closeness. Doubt needs distance to appear. You never doubt something that is dear to you, close to you. The moment you doubt something, it is no longer dear to you; a distance has come. You may doubt yourself, but you do not doubt that which is yours. Self-doubt is a lack of closeness to oneself. Belongingness, closeness and intimacy are all antidotes for doubt.

A doubt is a gray area. Gray area is something which is neither white nor black. Now, how to solve a doubt? Accept a doubt as either black or white. See your doubt as white and there is no doubt. See the doubt as black and accept it. Either way, you accept it and move on. See someone as either honest or dishonest and accept him. Then your mind is quiet. Then you are not in the gray area of doubt. Have conviction - “He is dishonest and yet he is still part of me. I accept him as he is”. 

That’s it. Finished. Doubt is an unstable state with footing neither on this shore nor that shore. From there tension arises. One way or the other, take a direction and regain your footing. Have you noticed that you usually doubt only the things that are positive in your life? Negative things you don’t doubt. You doubt a person’s honesty, and you believe in his dishonesty. 

When someone is angry with you, you have no doubt about his anger. But when someone says he loves you, a doubt creeps in, does he really love me? When you are depressed, do you ever think Am I really depressed? No, you take your depression as a fact. Yet when you are happy, you doubt – Am I really happy, is this really what I wanted You doubt that you are capable, but do you ever doubt that you are incapable? 

See this tendency to doubt the positive things in your life. Put doubt in its proper place and doubt the doubts. Doubt the negative and put your trust more in the positive.