Awareness of the Self - I

 

It is the intellect that divides the world, and the same intellect can bring it together by soaking itself in divinity. When the intellect discusses mundane things, it starts dividing the existence. When the intellect discusses knowledge, wisdom and truth, then it starts uniting. It brings forth the transcendental. It rediscovers its true nature, which is non-dual. Whether you complain, compose a poem, or speak knowledge, you are a witness to the flow. 

When someone complains or justifies, they are simply saying things spontaneously. In the same way, when you speak knowledge of the self, or spontaneously compose a poem aloud, there is a flow from the intellect. Anything can flow from the intellect, and you are a witness to the flow, whether it is garbage or wisdom. All that you can do is pray to the Divine, ‘Let wisdom, divinity and truth flow through this intellect”.

There are 5 factors that influence the mind - place, time, food, past impressions, associations and actions. Every place you are in has a different impact on the mind. Even in your house you can see that you feel differently in different rooms. A place where there has been singing, chanting and meditation has a different influence on the mind. Suppose you like a particular place, you may find that a little later it will not be the same. Time is also a factor. Different times of the day and year have different influences on the mind. Different types of food that you eat influence your mind for several days. Past impressions, karma, have different impacts on the mind. 

Awareness, alertness, knowledge and meditation help erase past impressions. Associations and actions, or the people and events you are associated with also influence your mind. In certain company your mind behaves in one way and with others your mind behaves in a different way. Though these 5 factors influence your life and your mind, know that the Self is much more powerful. As you grow in knowledge, you will influence them all. 

Desire, action and awareness of the Self are all manifestations of the same energy that is you. Among these three, one dominates at any one time. When you have many desires, you are not aware of the self. When desire dominates, self-awareness will be at its lowest and that is why philosophers all around the world have advocated renunciation and dropping desires. When desire dominates, stress and sorrow result. When action dominates, restlessness and disease are the result. When awareness dominates, happiness dawns. When your desires and actions are sincerely directed to the divine or welfare of society, then consciousness is automatically elevated, and self-knowledge is sure to be attained. 

An example inspires and brings confidence in the application of knowledge, and the visible sign of it is an undying smile. The self knows neither sorrow nor death, yet in it flow all relative events. It is easy to be detached when you are not in love. Being in utter love and yet undisturbed, caring yet not worried, persistent yet not perturbed all are the obvious signs of the Self shining through. 

Ten people were walking on foot from one village to an other. On the way, they had to cross a river. Reaching the other shore, they wanted to be sure all had crossed safely. Each one started counting but counted only nine. They became distraught and began to cry for the loss of the tenth. A wise man came along and asked them, “Oh, my dear friends, why are you crying?”. We were ten but now we are only nine” they replied. The wise man saw they were ten, so he asked them to count. Each counted nine but left out himself. Then the wise man made them stand and count off, one by one, and he said to the last person, “You are the tenth”. And they all rejoiced for having regained the tenth.

Do you need protection?

 

Only that which is temporary, small or perishable needs protection, while that which is permanent, big or vast does not. Protection simply means prolonging the time in a particular state, hence protection also prevents transformation.

Transformation cannot happen with total protection. At the same time, without protection the desired transformation cannot happen. A seed needs protection to transform into a plant, a plant needs protection to become a tree. Protection can aid or hamper transformation. The protector should have an idea to what extent he should protect. Both protection and transformation fall within the purview of time and space and these laws have to be honoured in order to transcend time. 

We are both protected and transformed. This is Hari and Hara; Hari, the protector and Hara, the transformer. Protection is limited to time, to perishable things. How long can a doctor heal or protect someone? Forever? No. Truth does not need any protection. Peace and happiness do not need protection because they are not temporary. Your body needs protection, your soul does not. Your mind needs protection, the self does not. The self is not the mind body complex. This is an erroneous notion. Neither the body nor the mind is the self. All the yoga asanas you do are for the body. All the meditation you do is for the mind. 

The purpose for this body to exist is to make you aware of how beautiful you are, and to make it possible to live all the values you cherish and create a world of divinity around you. Whether calm or disturbed, your mind remains mind. Whether sick or well, your body remains body. Self is all encompassing. When a part of the body is stimulated, pleasure arises. When your soul is stimulated, love arises. Love has no end, but pleasure ends. Often people think pleasure is love. The distinction between pleasure and love has to be understood. Only the luckiest will understand this. 

Just as you eat sugar and stimulate the tongue, music stimulates the ears and sight stimulates the eyes. And what stimulates the soul? Sadhana and satsang are what stimulate the soul. All that one wants is stimulation of the soul. Even a faint idea of it keeps life going. Every other stimulus is on the surface. The stimulus of the soul energizes and the stimulus of the body brings fatigue. 

Every stimulus should lead you to the Self so that when you listen to music, you transcend the music, and when you listen to knowledge it takes you to silence. 

Understanding the variety in divinity

 

Some schools of thought do not give God the freedom to appear in His many forms. They want Him in one uniform. You change your appearance to suit the occasion, so how can you think there is no variety in the Spirit? Ancient people knew this and that is why they cognized the Divinity as infinite qualities and forms. 

The Spirit is not dull and boring. The Spirit that is the basis of creation is dynamic and ever-changing. God is not only one, but many. When you accept the variety of Divinity, you cease to be a fanatic or a fundamentalist. 

Who wakes up first, you or God? You wake up first, while God is still asleep. When you wake up, you experience pleasure and pain. You become aware of the beauty and the shortcomings of the world. Then, when you seek the ultimate, your cry for help wakes up God, and when God is awakened in you, there is no “two”. 

The rishis made a mock practice of awakening God every morning. They called it the Suprabhatam service. Many people find this ridiculous because they do not understand the depth of it. But only awakened God can see that God is everywhere, asleep. God is asleep in every particle of this universe. God is in you in seed form and when he awakens, neither you nor the world remain. God does not wish you to have more faith because it will mean more work for Him. Then you will start to control Him and He will have to run behind you. God is the servant of faithful servants. He does not want too many servants telling Him what He should be doing. Love is the highest strength, yet it makes you absolutely weak. 

So God, the Enlightened One, Nature, does not want you to have more faith or love. With too much faith and love, you make God weak. So, it is better for God that you have less faith. Things can go on as they are. Why transform? Be happy. 

On the day of the full moon at the ancient temple of Kollur an elaborately decorated chariot of the Goddess is pulled around the temple. Each one of us is a chariot carrying the power of God within. We are the real chariots of the Divine. Our body is the chariot and our soul is the deity that is pulled around to purify the world.

Is God one or many?

 

Are you testing God? God will never pass your test because He will never show up for it. If He does show up for your test, then He is not God!

The Divine has given you all the small pleasures in the world, but has kept bliss to Himself. To get the highest bliss, you have to go to Him and Him alone. Do not be too smart with the Divine and try to fool Him. Most of your prayers and rituals are just attempts to trick the Divine. You try to give the least and get the most out of the Divine, and He knows this. God is an astute businessman, he will trick you even more. If you sweep something underneath the carpet to find Him, He will sweep something underneath the floor. Be sincere, do not try to outsmart the Divine. 

Once you receive bliss, then everything else is joyful. Without bliss, any joy in the world is will not stay. 

You have always thought of God as a father up in the heavens somewhere. With that concept in mind, you want to demand and take from God. But can you see God as a child? When you see God as a child, you have no demands. God is the very core of your existence. 

You are pregnant with God, you must take care of your pregnancy and deliver the child into the world. Most people do not even deliver. God is your child. God clings to the devotee. He clings to you like a baby until you grow old and die. God keeps crying for nourishment. He needs you to nourish Him in the world. Sadhana, satsang and seva are God’s nourishment.

Why do you think God is only one? Why cannot God also be many? If God made man in His own image, then what image is He? African, Mongolian, Caucasian, Japanese, Filipino? 

Why are there so many types of man and so many varieties of things? There is not just one type of tree, not just one type of snake, cloud, mosquito or vegetable. There is not just one type of anything, so why should God be only one? How could this consciousness that manifested this whole creation and which loves variety, be monotonous? 

God loves variety, so He must be of infinite variety Himself. God manifests in many names, forms and varieties.

Who does God belong to?

 

Suppose you go to God, to get a boon. When your intention is to get a boon, then you are in a hurry. Another person knows that he already owns God, he is not in a hurry for anything. Infinite patience comes up in him. 

What does it mean to ‘own God?’ It means realizing that the Divinity and His entire creation already belong to you. 

Usually, you shop in a hurry at the supermarket and rush back home. But when the whole store is already in your home, you’re not in a rush to shop, you are at ease. Your hurry to get something throws you off balance and makes you small. Have an ‘eternal wait’ infinite patience. Realize that God belongs to you. Through this awareness or through spiritual practices you will reach infinite patience. 

To develop patience, should one observe the impatience? Just observe the thoughts and feelings and do not regret them. 

When you know you are part of the divine plan, you stop demanding. You know everything is being done for you. You are taken care of. Usually we hurry the mind and are slow in our action. Impatience means hurry in the mind, lethargy means slowness in action. It is better the other way around. Patience in the mind and dynamism in action is the right formula.

Testing is part of ignorance. You only test that of which you are not sure. If God is testing you, it means God does not know you well enough. How could people ever think that God is testing them? God does not test you because he knows you in and out, your past, present and future. He knows your strengths and weaknesses and He alone gives you strength. He does not test you. Only you can test yourself. Only when you do not have confidence, then you test, if you are confident, why would you test? If you are testing yourself, you do not know yourself. 

Role of religion

 

To worship or idolise without a sense of belonging is always futile. Such worship only results in fear and distance. On the other hand, some are paranoid about worship. They get annoyed when they see others worshipping. Modes of worshipping or idolizing are different in different parts of the world. Some worship the Pope, others worship pop stars, some are crazy about politicians. Look at the children, they worship their heroes on posters all over the walls. Adoration alone makes you a fan. A sense of belonging and seeing the divinity in those whom you adore makes you a saint.

Those who worship without a sense of belonging, and those who are against worship are in the same boat, both are clogged with fear.

The Bible says, “I’m your God. You shall have no other gods before me”. The same is said in the ancient Indian scriptures. “One who worships God as separate from the ‘I am’ consciousness is dull headed”, and “Pooja aur na deva” do not worship other gods. The offering, the offered and the offerer are all one. The role of religion is to make one righteous and loving, and the purpose of politics is to care for people and their welfare. When religion and politics do not coexist, then you have corrupt politicians and pseudo-religious leaders. 

A religious man who is righteous and loving will definitely care for the welfare of the whole population and hence becomes a true politician. And a true politician can only be righteous and loving. He cannot be anything but religious. All the avatars and prophets have been caring for people and so were in politics. You can find many examples to this effect. When religions restrict freedom to worship and restrict modes of worship, they become unsuitable for creating a harmonious society. 

When religion becomes all-encompassing and gives full freedom to pray and worship in any manner that religion will bring righteousness and peace in people and will be suitable for any society. People think that politics and religion have to be kept separate because many religions did not give freedom to worship and did not care for all people equally. History has shown that religion has created conflict. But irreligious societies, such as communism, have created chaos and corruption. 

Today both politics and religion need reform. Politicians must become more righteous and spiritual. Religion must become broader and more spiritual to allow freedom of worship and to encompass all the wisdom in the world.

Dependence is both an illusion and reality

 

The body is dependent on the whole creation. In society, someone must sew clothes, produce electricity, drill for oil. The body cannot be independent of the world. For the body, dependence is absolute. When the spirit identifies with the body, then it gets pinched and it looks for independence. Mind, intellect, ego, they all look for independence. 

In looking for independence you often get stuck in the ego and become more miserable, but most people are not aware of their dependency. When they become aware of their limitations and dependency, the desire for independence arises. 

Independence cannot be achieved unless you start moving from within and when you move within, you discover that you are interdependent. The individual Self is interdependent and in fact, every wise person knows that everything is interdependent and that there is no such thing as independence. 

On one level dependence is a harsh reality. On another level, it is an illusion because there is nothing else but the Self. It is only when you do not feel oneness, belongingness that you want independence. Because the self is non-dual, there is no question of dependence or independence. 

One who asks for independence is a beggar. One who knows that it is an illusion is a king. When the sense of belongingness is not well founded, there is a volatile state in the life of a seeker. The ego then finds some excuse to revert to smallness because it is not yet soaked in the totality of knowledge. As the ego is not accustomed to belongingness, the mind finds every little excuse to revert back to the ego and to be aloof, independent and separate. It finds any small fault and blows it out of proportion. Be aware of these tendencies and come what may, be strong in the commitment to satsang, to the spiritual path.

Need for organization

 

The entire creation is a huge organization. Everything is made up of atoms. The whole world is nothing but an organization where the atoms have decided to arrange themselves in a specific pattern, to form a particular substance. And those particular patterns bring them specific qualities. Death, decay and transformation happen when the atoms get bored with patterns and decide to reorganize themselves. 

When the atoms of an apple say, “Enough of being an apple”, that is when the rotting starts. If there is never boredom of patterns, there can be no decay. The movement from one organized state to another is also organized. This is the transient organization which we call chaos. This transient organization may need a catalyst, and knowledge is such a catalyst. So, you have absolutely no escape from organization. 

You cannot eliminate formality in society. It has its place. Formality improves communication. Communication is only necessary where there are two. Formality maintains duality. Cordiality improves communion – oneness. Without cordiality, formality can be hypocritical and may appear uncaring. 

Organizational structures are based on formality. An organization cannot begin, orderliness cannot prevail, if formalities are abandoned. All your plans of action are measured steps of formality. 

Cordiality is one’s nature, the core of one’s existence, formality is the outer shell. When the outer shell is thin, like the shade of a lamp, the inner light can shine forth. But if the shade is too opaque, you cannot see the light. Love and knowledge are rooted in cordiality. For these to blossom, you need an informal, cordial environment. Devotion is informal and totally chaotic. 

Devotion and organization go hand in hand

 

What is the difference between desire and longing? Desire is the fever of the head. Longing is the cry of the heart.

Organization is control. Devotion is chaos. 

Organization needs attention to details, a material awareness. Organization is being worldly. Devotion is getting lost, forgetting the world, being in ecstasy. 

Organization and devotion are opposite in nature. They do not go together, yet they cannot be apart or exist without each other. No organization can arise without devotion. When you have so much devotion, you want to organize. Devotion brings faith, compassion and responsibility and a desire to share knowledge, wisdom and love. That is when organization happens.

Organization exists through devotion. If you are devoted, you will not simply sit. The nature of devotion is to give. If you think you are devoted and you are not caring for the world, then you are merely selfish. Real devotion means being one with the Divine, and the Divine cares for the world. 

You often lose devotion in organizing. And often, in the name of devotion, you create chaos or disregard the organization. You have to be a saint to be both in devotion and organization. With both, you are on the mark. So get lost, and be guided.

Make your devotion - intense

 

Intentions keep the tension in. Being hollow and empty means dropping all intentions. Within tension, rest does not become deep. But, devotion dissolves intentions. Intention pushes you to the future, but bliss is always in the present. The one who wakes up to this truth is wise. 

Occasionally, if an intention arises in a state of bliss, the intention can manifest effortlessly. The more intentions you have, the more “in tension” you will be. To minimize your intentions could be your last intention. 

For your prayer to be answered, your desire must be intense. The greater the intensity of your desire and the later it gets fulfilled, the greater will be your gratitude. Intense desire leads you to devotion. For desire to become intense, some time and need are required. When a desire is fulfilled, it loses its charm and significance in the overwhelming feeling of gratitude. 

The son of a farmer in India had a lifelong desire to go to England, and he prayed deeply for it. When the news of his trip finally materialized, he was filled with such immense gratitude that he no longer cared whether he went or not. 

People think that they are unfortunate if their desires are not fulfilled quickly. Intense desire can frustrate you or make you prayerful. In prayerfulness, there is gratitude and devotion. Any intense experience makes you whole. 

Your consciousness is like corn - with the heat of knowledge, consciousness pops up and becomes white and fluffy.

Attaining the Divine depends on the intensity of your longing and not on the time or qualifications. A proverb among the villagers in India says, “It may take some time to pluck a flower, but it takes no time to meet the Divine”. Your abilities or qualifications are not the criteria, it is simply the intensity of your longing. 

Intensify your longing for the Divine right away. This happens when you know that you are nothing and that you want nothing. Knowing that you are nothing and that you want nothing brings a sense of belonging, and belonging intensifies longing. 

Why and how of achieving emptiness

 

Bliss cannot be understood and it is extremely difficult to achieve. After many lifetimes you finally achieve bliss, but once achieved, it is even more difficult to lose. All that you seek in your life is bliss, that divine union with your source, and everything else in the world distracts you from that goal. 

There are a million things to distract you from that goal in so many ways, so many inexplicable, incomprehensible ways of not coming home. The mind is kept alive by cravings and aversions. Only when the mind dies does bliss dawn. 

Bliss is the abode of all divinity, all devas. It is only possible to comprehend bliss, to uphold it in this human body. And having had a human life and having known this path, if you still do not realize this, you are at the greatest loss. Cravings and aversions make your heart hard. There is no use being polite in your behaviour if you are rough in your heart. If your behaviour is rude it is acceptable, but not if you are rough in your heart. 

The world does not care how you are inside. It will only see your behaviour. The Divine does not care how you are outside. He only looks within. Never let even a small amount of dislike or craving reside in your heart. Let it be fresh, soft and fragrant like a rose. It is such an illusion you dislike someone or something, and this only makes you hard and your hardness takes a long time to soften, to disappear.

It is such a trap for keeping you away from the treasure. Nothing in this material world can give you contentment. An outer-looking mind seeking for contentment gets more discontented and the discontentment grows, and complaints and negativity start hardening the brain, clouding the awareness, the aura, and forming a huge cloud of negative approach. When the negativity reaches its peak, like an over-inflated balloon, it bursts and comes back to the Divinity. 

You can never escape the Divine, the long route of negativity, or the instantaneous positive approach. When Divinity dawns, in no time, the shift happens from untruth to truth, from darkness to light, from dull inert matter to sparkling spirit. 

When the heart is hard, there is no fun. You cannot experience fun. Stretching sound is music. Stretching movement is dance. Stretching the smile is laughter. Stretching the mind is meditation. Stretching life is celebration. Stretching the devotee is God. Stretching feeling is ecstasy. Stretching emptiness is bliss. 

Emptiness is the doorway between the material and spiritual worlds. It is where you come to understand the nature of the spirit. If you do not know emptiness, then you cannot know the joy of the being. The knack for experiencing the being causes emptiness. From the emptiness begins the fullness. On one side of emptiness is misery and on the other Side is joy. That is what Buddha meant when he said, “The whole world is misery and what is to be achieved is emptiness”.

Nature of consciousness

 

There is an expression “looking with a thousand eyes” – you are all eyes. You can feel without the skin. That is why people without limbs can still feel sensations in their missing limb. You can smell without the nose and taste without the tongue. When someone says something, you are "all ears" - you are listening with every cell of your body. 

The five senses and the ability to think are all present in consciousness. So each cell of the body has the potential to perform all the functions of the senses. All cells are made of the same tissue each DNA molecule contains all functions of the body. Consciousness is inherent in all cells and every sensory stimulus brings knowledge, which is the nature of consciousness. 

Some people who have lost one of their senses find that the others become heightened. You do not have to lose one to sharpen the others. You can sharpen all of them in deep silence. A single cell becomes the whole body. Somewhere it becomes fingertips, somewhere it becomes the nose and tongue, but everything is a manifestation of a single cell. In the same way, the entire universe is made up of a single substance. 

Feeling that everything is made up of one thing heals the body and mind and balances the three doshas in the body - vata, pitta and kapha. This is savitarka samadhi, which means equanimity with logical awareness. 

Awareness during deep sleep is jada samadhi - equanimity with inertia. Hence sleep is the main factor in healing. Medicines will not help without sleep and rest. Samadhi with ecstasy has no logic. This is nirvitarka samadhi, equanimity with bliss. Nirvitarka samadhi is even beyond the experience of bliss, indefinable beyond words. 

Three forces of nature and how to balance them

 

There are three forces in nature - Brahma shakti, Vishnu shakti, and Shiva shakti. One of these may predominate in you. Brahma shakti is the force that creates something new, Vishnu shakti is the ability to maintain and Shiva shakti infuses new life, destroys old things and brings transformation. 

Some of you have Brahma shakti. You may create something well, but you may not be able to maintain it. For example, you may make friends very quickly, but the friendships do not last long. 

Others among you have Vishnu shakti. You cannot create but you are good at maintenance. For example, you have long-lasting friendships, but you cannot make any new friends. 

Some of you have more Shiva shakti. You bring in new life or transformation, or you can destroy the whole setup. With Guru shakti, all three shaktis have fully blossomed. So, identify which shakti predominates in you and aspire for Guru shakti. Guru makes a group but a group cannot make a Guru. 

Often people think they are in control of their life, their situation, their world. Control is an illusion. The whole world moves according to the laws of Nature in an auspicious rhythm of innocence, intelligence, and divinity. That is Shiva. Shiva is the eternal state of being, the One without a second, the harmonious innocence that knows no control. 

Control is Vashi –Shiva reversed. Vashi is of the mind. Vashi is weakness. Vashi is doing something by exerting unnatural pressure. Vashi requires two, and duality is the cause of fear. 

Shiva, that harmonious innocence, dissolves duality. Shiva means wholeness of the moment. When there is no regret of past, no want of future, the moment is whole and compete. Time stops, mind stops. Every cell in your body has the ability of all five senses. You can see without the eyes, vision is part of consciousness, which is why in dreams you can see without the eyes.