Expectations are a part of life, expectations are natural. But, when they come up, you should simply become aware that by expecting, you are only reducing joy in your life. When you grow in wisdom, you will see that all these impressions drop of and give way to something bigger and something more beautiful. We simply need to know that surprises give us more joy. You give your 100 percent, do whatever you can, and if somebody expects more, it is their problem, not yours.
When people don’t live up to your expectations, you get frustrated, and you blame or curse them. By cursing, you lose your spiritual energy. When you bless, your energy goes up. Your own experience tells you time and time again that expectations reduce your enjoyment of life. Yet, most of us do not even realize; having too many expectations about everything, could be a reason for not being naturally happy. Expectation is just our imagination about how things might be. It prevents the mind from being fully with what is happening in the moment and thus, reduces the joy that is inherent in the present moment.
Clearly, expectations are not something we can or should avoid. They are just like all other thoughts; they arise and pass away on their own. Simply observing expectations with the knowledge that they reduce enjoyment in life is enough to avoid getting caught up into it. Unfulfilled expectations are a major source of disturbance. Many of us need an understanding of our mind and of life itself before we can let go of expectations. This understanding can be gained through wisdom and meditation.
Say, you are attending a group meditation session and a phone rings. Phones continue to ring several more times during the session. One possible response is that you let go of your expectation that people obey the instruction to turn their phones of and accept the ringing phones. Alternatively, you may be unable to accept and may feel that the phone owners are lacking in awareness and inconsiderate. Consequently, your mind will be simmering with irritation during your meditation.
Now, an equally loud noise could happen by dogs barking, rain, thunder or traffic. The reason you would not be annoyed about the noise generated by these phenomena is that you would accept them as part of nature, as spontaneous happenings. On the other hand, with the phones, you feel that the situation could have been avoided if people had behaved as they should. The feeling that the situation could have been different is at the core of your disturbance. Recognise that the problem is not in the situation but your reaction to it!
